第二章
1我對我的這次旅行做了非常詳細的描述,我初次進這個城市的情況我也將詳細地介紹。這樣做是為了使你在想像中能夠把這種不太有希望的開始,和我以後成為這個城市的重要人物做一個對比。因為我所有的好衣服要從海道運來,所以我就穿著工作服。長途旅行,我渾身都是髒兮兮的,口袋裡裝滿了襯衫和襪子。我一個人都不認識,也不知道去哪裡住。因為旅行,划船,缺乏休息而感到十分疲倦,人又很餓。但是我所有現金是1荷蘭盾和1個先令的銅幣。我把銅幣付給船老闆作為船錢,他起先不肯收,因為我劃了船,但我堅持要他收下。一個人很窮的時候,他可能比有錢的時候更慷慨,也許因為害怕別人認為他很小氣。
2然後我就到大街上去了,四處打量,直到我在市場附近遇到一個手拿麵包的男孩。我以前經常拿麵包當飯吃,問過他在哪裡買麵包以後,我立即走到他指給我看的那個麵包店,就在第二街那裡。我要我們在波士頓那裡一樣的麵包,但是在費城他們好像不做那樣的。然後,我就要一個3便士的麵包,他們說那也沒有。我沒有考慮到或者不知道兩地貨幣價值的不同,費城的東西相當便宜。我便要他們給我價值3便士的任何麵包,於是,他給了3個很大的麵包。我對他給我的麵包數量大為吃驚,但我還是接下來了。由於口袋裡面沒有地方放,所以我就一隻胳膊下夾一個,嘴巴裡面吃著另外一個。我就這個樣子從市場路到了第四大街,經過了我未來岳父裡德先生的門口。我未來的妻子——她這個時候正好在門口,她看到了我,她覺得我的樣子非常滑稽可笑,事實上我就是那個樣子。轉了一個彎,然後我又來到了板栗街和胡桃街的一段,一路上我都吃著我那麵包。又轉了個彎以後,我發現自己又回到了市場街我們船停靠碼頭的附近,我就在那裡喝了點河水。由於一個麵包我就吃飽了,我把剩下的兩個麵包給了一個婦女和她的孩子。她們是和我一起坐船來的,現在正準備繼續她們的行程。
3吃過飯,我有了精神,我到大街溜躂去。大街上衣冠楚楚的人多了起來,他們都朝著一個方向去。我加入他們的隊伍,進入到了市場附近的教友會的大教堂裡面。我坐在他們中間,四處看了看,沒有發現有人發表演講。由於前天晚上缺乏睡眠和過度的勞累,我困死了,於是睡著了,一直睡到會議結束為止。這時候,一個好心人把我叫醒了。這就是我第一次在費城進過或者說睡過覺的房子。
4我向河邊走去,一路上我注視著人們的臉龐。我碰到了一個我覺得臉龐和善的教友會教徒,我就問他,外地人可以到哪裡住宿。那個時候,我們正在「三個水手」的店牌附近。他說:「就是這裡了!」。「這裡就是接待外來旅客的地方,但這個地方的聲譽不好,你要是願意的話就跟我走,我會帶你到一個更好的地方去。」後來,他就把我帶到了水街的克魯克旅館。我就住在那裡。當我吃飯的時候,店主問了我幾個意味深長的問題,可能從年齡和外表來看我像個逃犯。
5吃過飯以後,睡意又來了。店家就把我領到我的舖位那裡,我沒有脫衣服就睡下了,一直睡到晚上6點的時候,然後我被叫醒去吃晚飯。吃過飯,我又早早地去睡覺了,一直睡到第二天早晨。我盡量把自己打扮得整潔一點,然後去了安德魯·佈雷福德印刷廠。在那個地方,我碰到了那個店主的父親,就是我在紐約認識的那個老人家。老人家是騎馬來的,他比我先到費城。他把我介紹給他的兒子,他兒子很客氣地待我,並且請我吃了早餐。但他告訴我,他現在不缺人手,因為他最近剛招了個人。不過,鎮上剛開了一家印刷所,店主叫凱默,他可能會要我。如果不行的話,他歡迎我住在他家,並會給我點零活幹干,直到我找到工作為止。
6老人家說他願意和我一起去那個印刷的老闆那裡。當我們找到那家店老闆的時候,佈雷福德就對他說,「朋友啊,我帶了個年輕的印刷匠給你,你也許會需要他的。」他問了我一些問題,然後給我一副字盤,看我如何操做。然後他告訴我,他會盡快叫我來上班,儘管他現在沒有事情讓我做。然後他就和佈雷福德攀談起來,他把他從來沒有見過面的老人佈雷福德當做了鎮上對他一片善心的人。他講了他目前的經營情況和未來的計劃。但是佈雷福德沒有告訴他他是鎮上另一家印刷所老闆的父親。當凱默說他不久就可以拿到本城絕大多數生意的時候,佈雷福德就巧妙地問了幾個問題,他說他對凱默的話表示懷疑,凱默就對他解釋了一通,他告訴了佈雷福德他的靠山是誰,他打算採用什麼方式開展工作。我站在旁邊聽了他們所有的談話,立即可以看出他們兩個一個是生手一個老滑頭。佈雷福德把我留給凱默就走了。當我告訴凱默佈雷福德是誰的時候,他大吃了一驚。
7我發現,凱默的印刷廠裡只有一台老式的印刷機和一套舊的小號英文鉛字。這個時候他正在用那套鉛字排印前面講到的阿奎那·羅斯的《輓歌》。羅斯是個聰明的年輕人,具有高尚的品格,在鎮上受人尊重,他是議會秘書。同時,他也是個不錯的詩人。凱默自己也寫詩,但是寫的相當平常。不應該說他在寫詩,他只是把自己的思想直接用鉛字排印出來而已。由於沒有稿子,只有兩盤活鉛字,而《輓歌》有可能要所有的鉛字,所以沒有人可以幫上他的忙。我努力把他的印刷機整理了一下,那個機器他還沒有用過,他對那個東西一竅不通。這樣那個機器就可以印刷了,我答應等他那個《輓歌》一排好我就來印刷。我回到了佈雷福德的家裡,他暫時給我安排了些雜活幹,我在那裡住和吃。幾天以後,凱默叫人找我回去印刷《輓歌》。現在,他又弄到了另外兩隻活字盤,並且有本冊子要重印。他就叫我來幹活了。
8我發現這兩位印刷店的老闆對印刷業並不在行。佈雷福德並沒有受過這方面的訓練,他基本上是個文盲。對於凱默,他倒有些學問,但他只會排字而不知道印刷。他是法國先知派的教徒,能夠和他們一樣熱情和激動。那個時候,他並不是特別信仰某一宗教,他每樣都信一點,以便隨機應變。他對世間人情世故完全不懂。後來,我還發現,在他的性格裡有種流氓氣。他不喜歡我在他那裡工作卻在佈雷福德那裡住。事實上,他有間屋子,但卻沒有傢俱,所以他沒有辦法安排我住宿。但他安排我住在我在前面提到過的裡德先生處。這個時候,我的衣物已經運過來了,我把自己打扮了一下,在裡德小姐的眼中我的外表比她第一次看見我在街上吃麵包的時候體面多了。
9我現在開始和鎮上的一些年輕人有了來往。那都是喜歡讀書的年輕人,晚上和他們一起度過是很開心的。由於我的勤勞和節約,我還存了一筆錢。我生活得很開心,我希望沒有人知道我住在那裡,我盡量去忘掉波士頓。當然,我的朋友柯林斯除外,我在寫信給他的時候叫他替我保密。但是,一件偶然發生的事情使我回到了波士頓,這比我原來意料的早多了。我有一個叫羅伯特·霍姆斯的姐夫,他是一艘單桅帆船的船長,在波士頓和特拉華之間開船做生意。他在離費城40英里的紐卡斯爾聽說了我所在的地方,就給我寫了一封信,十分有誠意地勸我回去。他說在我突然離開波士頓出走以後,我波士頓的朋友都很掛念我,他還向我保證了大家對我是好意的,如果我回去的話,一切都會按照我的意思安排。我寫了封回信給他,感謝他的勸告。我詳細地告訴了他我離開波士頓的理由,這樣他就不會認為我離開波士頓像他原來想像的那樣沒有理由。
10威廉·基思爵士,是這個州的州長,他那個時候正在紐卡斯爾。當羅伯特·霍姆斯船長,我的姐夫接到我的信的時候,他正和州長在一起,他同威廉·基思爵士談起了我,還把我的信遞給他看。州長看了我的信,當姐夫告訴他我的年齡時,他似乎很吃驚。他說,我看起來是個前程似錦的人,應該給予鼓勵。他說費城的印刷業水平很低,如果我在費城開業我肯定可以成功。他說,他願意為我招攬公家的生意,並在其它方面就他能力所及幫助我。這些話是姐夫後來在波士頓告訴我的,但我當時對此一無所知。有一天,當我和凱默在窗戶旁邊做事的時候,我們看到了州長和另一位紳士(後來知道是紐卡斯爾的弗蘭奇上校),他們穿著精緻的衣服穿過街道,向印刷所而來,還聽到了他們到門口的聲音。
11凱默以為是找他的,連忙匆匆下樓。但是州長卻打聽我的事情,並且走上樓來,用一種我還沒有很習慣的禮貌對我誇獎了一通,並說他希望認識我。他還責怪我剛來這裡的時候為什麼不去見他。他還要把我帶去酒館,他說他正要和弗蘭奇上校一起去那裡,去品嚐一下那裡的上好的白葡萄酒。我是受寵若驚,凱默卻是呆若木雞。但我還是和州長、弗蘭奇上校一道去了酒館,就在第三街街角那裡。我們邊喝邊談,他建議我創辦自己的印刷廠,並說成功的希望很大,他和弗蘭奇上校都向我保證,要用他們自己的勢力和影響為我招攬軍政兩方面的生意。當我說我不知道我父親在這方面會不會幫助我的時候,威廉·基思爵士說他會給我父親寫封信,在信裡他會闡述我計劃的優勢所在,他相信他一定可以說服我父親。事情就這樣決定了,我將帶著他寫給父親的信,搭乘第一班船回波士頓。在這之前,這件事情還要保密,我向往常一樣回到凱默那裡工作。州長現在經常邀我一起吃飯,用一種異常和藹、隨便、友好的態度和我交談,那對我真是一種莫大的榮幸。
12大概在1724年的4月底,有船去波士頓。我說要去看我的朋友而離開了凱默。州長給了我一封很厚的信,他在信中對我父親說了我很多好話。他在信中極力推薦我在費城開辦印刷廠,說這一事業必能使我有個遠大前程。我們的船在開入海灣的時候碰上了淺灘,船漏水了。外面波濤洶湧,我們得不停地抽水,我也輪班抽水。但是,大概經過了兩個星期以後,我們平安地抵達了波士頓。我離開家已經有七個月了,我的朋友都不知道我到哪裡去了。霍姆斯還沒有回來,也沒有寫信談我的情況。我的不期而歸讓全家大吃一驚。所有的人都很高興我的歸來,非常歡迎我,除了哥哥。我去他的印刷所看他,那個時候我比在他那兒工作的時候穿的更考究,我穿一身筆挺時髦的西裝,口袋裡還掛了一隻表,身上還有差不多5英鎊銀幣。哥哥勉強接見了我,他把我上下打量了一番,又去做他的事情了。
13印刷所裡的工人都好奇地問我到哪裡去了,那個地方怎麼樣,我喜歡不喜歡那個地方。我對那個地方大加讚揚,我說我在那裡過得很開心,並表示了我將回那個地方的強烈願望。他們之中有人問那個地方的錢是什麼樣子的,我掏出一把銀幣來,在他們面前展開。這種銀幣是他們從來沒有見過的奇觀,因為波士頓只用紙幣。然後我逮住一個機會讓他們看我的表,最後,我送了他們一點錢買酒喝就走了。那個時候,哥哥的臉色還是很陰沉和悶悶不樂。我的這次拜訪讓他很不高興,儘管母親後來勸我們重歸於好,希望我們以後像兄弟那樣相處,不過他說我在其他人面前當眾侮辱他,他決不會忘記也決不會原諒我。但是,在這一點上,他誤會了我。
14當父親接到州長的信的時候,他顯然很吃驚。但他好幾天都沒有向我提到那件事情。當霍姆斯姐夫回來的時候,父親把這封信給他看。父親問他是否知道威廉·基思爵士,他是個什麼樣的人。父親還說威廉·基思一定是個考慮不周的人,他竟然讓一個還要三年才成年的小孩子去創業。霍姆斯姐夫說他很贊成這個計劃,但我父親明白那個計劃並不恰當,最後,他斷然拒絕了。隨後父親寫了封措辭委婉的信給威廉·基思爵士,感謝他對我的贊助和好意,但他拒絕資助我建立印刷廠,因為他覺得我還太年輕,他不能相信我能管理這樣一個需要如此巨額資金建立的一個重要企業。
15我的朋友柯林斯那個時候是郵局的一個辦事員,他聽了我在新地方的事情很高興。他也決定去那裡。當我還在等父親的決定的時候,他先走一步了。他從陸路去的羅德島。他把他大量的數學和自然哲學的書留了下來,叫我帶著一起到紐約去。他說他會在那裡等我。
16父親儘管不贊成威廉·基思爵士的建議,但他很高興我能從當地如此有聲望的人那裡得到這樣一封讚賞有加的信。他對我在這麼短的時間內,憑自己的能力把自己打扮得這樣體面感到很欣慰,因此,當他看到我和哥哥不可能在一起做事的時候,他就同意我返回費城。同時,父親要我尊重那裡的人,盡力得到人們的尊重,不要去譭謗和詆毀別人。他認為我那方面的傾向很嚴重。他還告訴我要勤奮工作,儉以生活,這樣到21歲的就可以有積蓄開辦自己的印刷廠了。那個時候,如果我還有所不足,他會幫助我的。這就是從父親那裡得到的全部東西,還有標誌著父親和母親愛子之心的一些小禮物。帶著他們的祝福和讚許,我登上了船前去紐約。
17我們乘坐的單桅帆船停靠在羅德島的新港後,我去拜訪了約翰哥哥。他已經結婚並在那裡住了幾年了。他對我很熱情,一直對我很愛護。他有位朋友叫佛農,有人欠他35英鎊,那人就住在賓西法尼亞州,哥哥要希望我代佛農收這筆債,並代為保管,直到我接到通知告訴我怎麼匯給他為止。然後,哥哥就給了我一張單子。這件事情後來帶給我很多不安。
18在新港,又上了很多去紐約的乘客。其中,有兩位年輕的婦女和一位嚴肅但精明、像管家婆似的教友會婦女,還有她們的僕人。我對那婦人很有禮貌,樂意為她們幫點小忙。我想這給她留下了好印象,因此,當她看到我和兩個年輕女子的關係一天比一天熱,她們好像也在鼓勵這種情況發生的時候。她就把我拉到一邊對我說:「年輕人,我很擔心你。你沒有朋友在身邊,好像對這個世道瞭解也不深,不知道一些人對年輕人所設的圈套。相信我,這兩個女子不是什麼好人,這我可以從她們的舉止看出來。如果你不當心的話,她們就會陷害你。你根本不認識她們,我勸你還是不要和她們來往。我這樣做都是為了你的安全,是出於好意的。」我開始並不相信那兩個年輕女子如婦人說的那樣壞。她就提醒我她觀察到的她們的一些可疑的言行和舉止,這些我都沒有注意到。現在想來,婦人說的都是對的。我感謝她對我的忠告,並且表示會按她講的去做。當船到達紐約的時候,那兩個女子邀請我去拜訪她們,並告訴了我她的住處,我沒有答應。幸虧我沒有去,第二天,船主就丟了一把銀勺子和一些其它的東西,這些東西是從艙房裡被偷走的。船主知道那兩個女人是妓女,就領了搜查令去搜她們的住所,結果找到了失竊的東西,小偷也受到了處罰。這次,船在途中幸運地避開了暗礁,但在我看來,我能避開這兩個妓女對我的意義更重大。
19在紐約,我找到了柯林斯,他比我先到幾天。我們從孩提時代開始就是好朋友。我們經常一塊兒讀書,但他看書和學習的時間比我多,他還是個數學天才,遠比我厲害。當我還在波士頓的時候,我有空就和他呆在一起聊天。他從來不喝酒,頭腦清醒,還相當勤奮,深得一些牧師和紳士的尊敬。他看來是一個很有前途的人。但是,在我離開波士頓的日子裡,他染上了喝白蘭地的惡習。我從他本人和其他人那裡得知,當他到紐約以後就天天喝得醉熏熏的,舉止行動十分古怪。他還賭博,輸光了自己的錢,以至於我不得不替他付房租,和負責他到費城的路費以及他在費城的生活費,這對我來說是個極大的麻煩。
20那個時候紐約的州長是伯內特(伯內特主教的兒子),他聽船長說他的旅客中有個年輕人帶了很多書籍,他就要求見見我。這樣我就去見他了。如果柯林斯沒有喝醉的話,我會帶他一起去的。州長很熱情地接待了我,並且領我參觀了他的圖書館。那個圖書館真大啊。我們針對書和他們的作者談了很多。這使我獲得了州長的青睞。對我這樣一個窮小子來說,這是十分讓人激動的。
21我們繼續前往費城。在路上的時候,我收到了別人欠佛農的錢。如果沒有那筆錢的話,我們是不可能完成我們的旅程的。柯林斯希望在某地當個會計,不知道別人是從他的呼吸還是從他的舉止中知道他是個酒鬼,所以儘管他有推薦信,但他還是沒有找到工作。他繼續和我吃住在一起,由我付帳。當他知道我有佛農的錢以後,他就不斷地向我借。他還承諾等他一找到工作就還錢給我。最後,他借了那麼多,以至於我都發愁,如果人家叫我匯錢過去的時候我應該怎麼辦才好。
22他繼續喝酒,為這件事情我們經常吵架。因為他只要有點醉,人就變得很暴躁。有一次,當他和幾個年輕人在特拉華州一塊划船玩的時候,輪到他劃,他卻不劃。他說:「你們得把我劃到我家裡去。」我說:「我們決不替你劃。」他就說:「你們必須得劃,要不就在水上過夜。你們看著辦吧。」「讓我們劃吧。這沒有什麼大不了的。」其他人就說。
23但是他的行為讓我很生氣,我堅決不同意。所以他發誓要我劃,要不然他就把我扔到河裡去。然後他就站到橫板上,看著我。當他跑過來抓我的時候,我就伸手抓住他的腿,然後站起來,把他頭朝下扔到水裡去了。我知道他游泳技術很好,所以一點都不在意他。所以,在他靠近船幫的時候,我們就連劃幾下,讓他沒有辦法靠近船。每當他靠近的時候,我們就一邊問他劃不划船,一邊連劃幾下讓船從他身邊滑過。他氣的都快死了,固執得死也不答應劃。後來,看他有點累了我們就把他撈了上來。晚上,我們把渾身濕淋淋的他送回了家。這以後,我們之間難得有一句好話。後來,一位來自印度群島的船長受一個叫巴巴多斯的紳士的委託,要給他的兒子找有一位老師,他偶然碰到了柯林斯,就答應送柯林斯去巴巴多斯那裡。柯林斯走的時候答應他一領到錢就匯給我以還清債務。但從這以後,我就一直沒有他的音信。
24動用佛農的錢是我一生中所犯下的重大錯誤之一。這件事情表明,父親認為我還年輕,不能管理重要企業的判斷是正確的。但是,當威廉·基思爵士讀到我父親給他的信的時候,他說父親太謹慎了。他說,人不能一概而論,謹慎不一定和年齡相生相伴。年輕人並不一定就不謹慎。他說:「既然他不幫助你。」「那我就來幫你。你需要從英國買什麼東西,給我張清單,我去買。你以後有能力再還我。我決定要讓本地有一家好的印刷廠。我相信你一定可以成功的。」他說這些話的時候,態度很誠懇,我絲毫不懷疑他說的話。我迄今為止一直把我想在費城開印刷廠的秘密藏在心裡。如果某個深知州長為人的朋友知道我把希望寄托在他的身上的話,他們肯定會告訴我州長這個人並不可靠。後來,我才聽別人說,他這個人從來都是光許願,而從不去做的。但我根本沒有要他幫助我,我怎麼能認為他的慷慨幫助是沒有誠意的呢?我相信他是這個世界上最好的人之一。
25我給了他一份開辦一個小印刷廠所需物品的清單。照我估計,大概要100英鎊。他很高興,但是問我,要是我能夠去英國親自挑選鉛字並檢查各種機器的部件是不是更好。「而且,」他又說,「在那個地方,你可以結識一些人,可以在賣書和文具方面與他們建立聯繫。」我認為這樣做是有益處的,就同意了州長的建議。「那麼,」他說,「做好準備坐安尼斯號去。」那艘船是那個時候惟一的一艘一年一次往來於倫敦和費城的船隻。但是離安尼斯號啟程的日子還有幾個月,我就繼續在凱默那裡做事。同時,心中為柯林斯借錢的事情焦慮不安,每天擔心佛農叫我匯錢過去。不過,這種事情幾年之內都沒有發生。
26我想我還忘了告訴你,當我第一次坐船從波士頓去費城的時候,我們的船停靠在布來克島。旅客們開始捉鱈魚吃,並且捉了很多。迄今為止,我堅守不吃葷食的信條。這種時候,我和我的老師屈里昂站在一條線上,他認為捉一條魚就等於殺一次生。因為魚過去沒有,將來也不會傷害我們,所以我們沒有正當的理由殺害它們。這些似乎都是很有道理的。但是,在這之前,我是很喜歡吃魚的,當熱氣騰騰的魚剛從炸鍋裡拿出來的時候,聞起來真香啊!我在愛好和原則之間猶豫了好長時間,直到我想起有人在魚肚子裡發現小魚的時候。那個時候,我就想,「你可以吃小魚,我為什麼不能吃你啊。」因此,我就痛快地吃了一頓鱈魚。從那以後,我就和別人一樣吃葷,只是偶爾吃素食。做一個有理智的生物是如此方便,它可以為你找到或者建構一個理由去做你心裡想做的事情。
27凱默和我相處的很不錯,意見也相投,因為他還不知道我要獨自開辦印刷廠的事情。他一直保持著往日濃厚的熱情並且喜歡辯論。因此,我們經常在一起辯論。我經常使用蘇格拉底式的辯論術,使用一些看起來顯然離我們的辯題很遠的問題,但漸漸地把他引入矛盾和困境之中。我用這種方法常常使他上我的圈套。最後,他的謹慎都變的很滑稽了,他總是先問,「你到底想幹什麼,」然後再回答我再普通不過的問題。但是,這件事情卻使他對我的辯論才能有了很高的評價,因此,他很認真地提議我和他一起建立一個新的教派。他負責布道,我負責和對手辯駁。不過,當他向我解釋教條的時候,我發現其中一些莫名其妙的東西正是我所反對的,除非我也可以加入點自己的意見或者介紹下我的一些看法。
28凱默留著長長的鬍子,因為在摩西法典裡說,「不許損毀鬍鬚一角」。也因此才把安息日定在星期六,這兩點對他都是必不可少的。這兩點我都不喜歡。但是,在他答應不吃葷食的情況下,我可以同意他的那兩點。「我懷疑」,他說,「那樣的話,身體會吃不消的。」我向他保證,身體可以受得了,而且那樣對身體還有更多的好處。他平常都吃的很多,我因此想,那吃得半飽的時候一定很有意思。如果我能陪他的話,他說他可以試一試。我同意了,並且繼續了三個月的時間。我們的飲食固定由一個鄰居婦人送來。她從我這裡拿走一份40種菜餚的菜單,按照不同的時候給我們送來,在這些菜單上沒有魚肉也沒有雞鴨。這種理念那個時候非常適合我,因為那樣很便宜,每週每人不會超過18個便士。從那個時候開始,我連續好幾個四旬齋都嚴格按照規則來辦,從平常飯到齋飯,從齋飯到平常飯,這種突然的變換沒有給我帶來一點不適應。因此,我就想,那種所謂的改變要循序漸進的建議沒有一點道理。我快樂地過著我的日子,但是可憐的凱默卻感到難於忍受,他已經厭倦了這個計劃。他一直渴望大吃一頓,所以他就叫了一份烤豬,並邀請我和他的兩個女性朋友跟他一起去吃。但烤豬上的太快了,他抵制不了那個誘惑,在我們到之前他就把它吃完了。29這段時間,我連續向裡德小姐求了幾次愛。我對她很傾慕,我也有理由相信她對我也有相同的情感。但是,她母親認為我們不用太急躁,因為我們都很年輕,才18歲多一點,我又要進行長途旅行,如果要結婚的話,還是等我回來以後——當我像我所期待的那樣建立了自己的事業以後,那樣會更加合適一些。也許,她認為我的期待並不像我想像的那樣十拿九穩。
30這個時候,我主要的朋友是查爾斯·奧斯本、約瑟夫·沃森和詹姆斯·拉爾夫,他們都是喜歡讀書的人。前兩個人是鎮上著名的公證人查爾斯·布羅格頓的書記,後面那個是一位商店職員。沃森是一個十分誠實正直聰明的年輕人。其他兩個人對宗教信仰觀念很淡薄,特別是拉爾夫。拉爾夫就像柯林斯那樣,老是不能讓我安生,給我帶來了很多麻煩。奧斯本則是個聰明坦率的人,對朋友真誠友愛,但是,在文學方面他太挑剔了。拉爾夫儀表堂堂,人很聰明,口才相當好,我還從來沒有遇到像他這樣好口才的人。這兩個人都很喜歡詩歌,並開始寫些小的作品。星期天的時候,我們4個人經常一起到斯古爾克河附近的小樹林裡快活地散步,在那裡我們輪流朗誦我們的作品給大家聽,並談論我們讀過的作品。
31拉爾夫喜歡研究詩,他不懷疑自己能夠成為一個傑出的詩人,並且會因此而致富。他認為即使是最優秀的詩人剛開始寫詩的時候,也會像他那樣有很多瑕疵。奧斯本勸他打消這個念頭,他確定拉爾夫沒有寫詩的天賦,勸告他不要想別的東西,把心思都放到他的本行上去。雖然拉爾夫沒有資本,但是憑著拉爾夫的勤奮和本分,他可以先做代理商,然後逐漸地自己開業。我贊成偶然寫點詩娛樂一下,同時改進自己的語言風格,除此之外,我沒有別的想法。
32為了提高我們的水平,於是大家建議,下一次我們聚會的時候,每人拿出一篇自己的作品,大家相互觀摩、批評、改正。由於我們的目的只在於語言和表達方式,大家一致贊成改寫讚美詩第18篇,這篇是描寫上帝降臨的。當我們聚會的日子臨近的時候,拉爾夫來找我,告訴我他的詩已經改好了,我告訴他,由於我一直沒有空,也沒有興趣,所以我還沒有寫。然後,他就讓我看他的詩,並徵求我的意見。我讀了一下,對之十分讚賞,在我看來,那真是一首好詩。「現在,」他說:「奧斯本經常說我的作品沒有任何長處,由於嫉妒,他總是會把它批得體無完膚。他對你並不嫉妒。因此,我希望,你就把這首詩拿去,就說是你寫的。我會裝著沒有時間,所以沒有寫。我們來看下他會說什麼?」我同意了他的請求,就立即重抄了一遍,這樣看起來就是我寫的了。
33我們聚會的時候到了。先讀到沃森的作品,雖然裡面有些好句,但瑕疵更多。然後就讀到奧斯本的詩,比沃森的好多了。拉爾夫對它們做了個公正的評論,既批評了它們的不足之處,也稱讚了它們的優點所在。然後他說他自己沒有寫。我很扭捏,好像請求他們放我一馬的樣子,聲稱時間不夠等等,但他們都不允許我有任何理由,一定要我把詩拿出來。所以,我就把拉爾夫的詩拿出來讀了一遍,並且重複了一遍。沃森和奧斯本甘拜下風,對之稱讚不已。拉爾夫對之作了些批評,並建議做一些修改,但我卻對之進行了辯護。奧斯本這個時候又跳出來反對拉爾夫,說拉爾夫的評論和他的詩一樣好不了多少。於是拉爾夫就不再爭辯。在他們一起回家的路上,奧斯本表達了他仍然想對我的詩表示讚賞,並且說他當著我的面不好這樣說,以免我覺得他在奉承我。「但是,誰能想到」,他說,「富蘭克林能寫出這麼好的詩來,這樣繪聲繪色,剛強有力,熱情奔放。他甚至做的比原詩還好,他平常講話的時候好像並不會用詞,笨嘴拙舌的。天啊,他的詩寫的太好了!」當我們第二次聚會的時候,拉爾夫說出了我們對奧斯本設的陷阱,大家笑了奧斯本一陣子。
34這件事情堅定了拉爾夫做一名詩人的決心。我盡了自己最大的努力去阻止他,但是他不聽,一直到波普的出現為止。然而,他後來成為了一名非常出色的散文家。我以後還會談到他。但是,對於其他兩個人,我以後可能幾乎不會有機會談到他們了。沃森幾年以後就死在了我的懷裡,我相當難過,他是我們當中最優秀的。奧斯本去了西印度群島,在那裡,他成了很有名的律師並且賺了很多錢,但他也在正當年輕的時候去世了。我們兩個曾經有過莊嚴的約定,如果誰先死的話,如果可能,他應該對對方做個友情訪問,告訴他他在那個世界怎麼樣,但他卻沒有遵守他說過的話。
35州長好像很願意和我在一起,他經常請我到他家裡去做客。幫助我開業是一個必談的話題。他除了要給我向銀行貸款的信用證,以便我可以購買印刷機、鉛字和紙張等等,還說要給我寫一些介紹信給他的朋友們。他好幾次說好了寫好那些信的日期,叫我去拿。但每次我去的時候,他就定了一個更遠的日子。就這樣,一直推到了船開的時候——這個船期也是推了幾次才定下來的。當我前去向他告別並取信的時候,他的秘書,巴德博士出來對我說,州長正在忙著寫那封信,他會在開船前趕到紐卡斯爾把信交給我。
36拉爾夫,儘管他已經結婚了,並且有了一個小孩,但他還是決定和我一起去。我認為他是想建立一種商業聯繫,並且拿點佣金。不過我後來發現,由於他和他妻子關係不好,他就想把妻子甩到這裡,自己不再回來了。我辭別了自己的朋友們,並且和裡德小姐進行了一番盟誓,然後坐船離開了費城。當船在紐卡斯爾停靠的時候,州長果然在那裡。但是,當我去他住處的時候,他並沒有見我,他的秘書出來了。他秘書說他正在做一項非常重要的公務,不過會把信送到船上來的,並衷心祝願我一路順風等等。我有點疑惑地回到船上,但還沒有懷疑什麼。
37安德魯·漢密兒頓先生是費城一位著名的律師,他和他的兒子跟我同船旅行。還有教友會商人德納姆先生。奧奈和拉塞爾先生也在,他們是馬裡蘭一家鐵廠的老闆。他們訂了頭等艙。我和拉爾夫不得不坐三等艙,那裡沒有人認識我們,大家都把我們當做普通人。但是,安德魯·漢密兒頓先生和他的兒子(名字叫詹姆斯,他後來當了州長),從紐卡斯爾回費城了。漢密兒頓先生被人用重金請去給一艘被逮住的船辯護。正當我們要啟程的時候,弗倫奇上校到船上來了,他對我們的熱情關注被大家看到了,那些紳士們就邀請我們去頭等艙,因為正好那裡空出了兩個位子來。所以,我們就到頭等艙去了。
38我知道弗倫奇上校上船的時候把州長寫的信帶來了,我就請船長把那些委託我管的信給我。船長說所有的信都放在一起,他這個時候沒有辦法挑出來。但是,在船到達倫敦前,他會給我機會讓我把那些信分揀出來。我因此就安心了。我們的旅行在繼續進行。船艙裡的人們很友善,加之安德魯·漢密兒頓先生留下的東西,因此我們的東西很豐富,生活得很美好。在這次旅行中,德納姆先生和我結下了深厚的友誼,我們一直保持著這種友情。但是,從另一方面來講,這次旅行又是令人不愉快的,因為天氣實在太糟糕了。
39當我們到達英吉利海峽的時候,船長實現了他的允諾,他讓我在信包裡找州長寫的信。但由我轉交的信一封都沒有找到。我按他的筆跡找出了六七封信,我想那可能是州長答應為我寫的。尤其是其中一封寫給皇家印刷所巴斯克特的信和另外一封給一個文具商的信。我們在1724年12月24日抵達倫敦,我先拜訪了那個離我近的文具商,並且遞上了基思州長的信。他說:「我不知道有這樣一個人。」然後他就打開了信。「哦,原來是裡德爾斯登寫的。我最近發現這個人完全是個大騙子,我將斷絕和他的來往,並且拒絕收受他的任何來信。」然後,他就把信退回到我手上,轉過身去招待他的其他顧客。我這才發現這些信不是州長寫的。經過回憶和比較前後的事實情況,我開始懷疑州長的誠意了。我找到朋友德納姆,把這件事情的情況講給他聽。他告訴了我基思的為人,他說基思絕對不可能給你寫信。瞭解他的人都不會對他有絲毫的信任。他對基思會給我信用證的想法一笑了之,他說,他根本沒有信用可給。當我對他說我對日後怎麼辦表示擔憂的時候,他建議我盡力在我這一行找個工作。他說:「就在這裡的印刷行業做,你會得到提高的。這樣,當你以後返回新大陸開印刷廠就會更好些。」
40我們兩個人同那個文具商一樣恰巧都知道裡德爾斯登律師是個大流氓。他曾經唆使裡德的父親和他簽了份合同,幾乎讓裡德的父親破產。從這封信看來,似乎有一個不利於漢密兒頓先生的秘密計劃正在進行。他們因為漢密兒頓是和我們一起來英國的,基思和裡德爾斯登也牽涉到裡面去了。德納姆和漢密兒頓是朋友,他覺得應該讓漢密兒頓知道這件事情。因此,當漢密兒頓來英國不久,部分由於對基思和裡德爾斯登的憎惡,部分由於對漢密兒頓的好感,我拜訪了他,並且把信給了他。這封信對他很重要,他很誠懇地感謝了我。從那個時候開始,我們成為了朋友,後來他在許多方面對我幫助很大。
41但是,我們怎麼會想到一個州長會玩弄這種可憐的把戲,這樣欺騙一個可憐無知的孩子。原來他想取悅大家,但又沒有什麼好給的,所以就給個希望。這已經成為他的習慣了。除此之外,他倒是個聰明有智慧的人。他還是個好作家,人民的好州長,儘管他有的時候對有錢的選民的意思不理不睬。在他任期內,他制定通過了好幾部良法。
42拉爾夫和我形影不離。我們一起住在小不列顛,每星期的租金是3先令6便士,這是我們當時所能支付的最高租金。拉爾夫找到了他的幾個親戚,但是他們都很窮,沒有能力幫助他。拉爾夫這個時候讓我知道了他想留在倫敦,不再回費城的意思。他沒有帶錢來,他能籌到的錢都已經花在路上了。我有15塊西班牙金幣,所以他邊找工作邊不時地向我借點錢以維持生活。他先是想法子進入劇院,他覺得自己當個演員沒有問題,但是那個劇院的老闆威爾克斯,覺得他不可能在那方面有所成就,所以就坦率地告訴他不要想吃這碗飯。然後,他就找佩特羅斯特街的出版商羅伯茨談了談,他希望在一定條件下為他那份類似《旁觀者》的週刊撰稿,但是羅伯茨沒有答應那些條件。隨後,他又試圖想當個作家助手,替出版社或者法學會的律師抄抄寫寫什麼的,但人家那裡不缺人。
43我很快就在帕爾默印刷所找到了工作。那是在巴塞洛謬巷口的一家有名的印刷所。我在那裡工作了將近一年。我很勤快,但我把收入的很大一部分花在和拉爾夫看戲以及其它娛樂方面。我原來的西班牙金幣也花掉了。現在我們只能勉強餬口。拉爾夫好像全然忘掉了他的妻子和孩子,至於我,某種程度上也忘記了我對裡德小姐的山盟海誓。我只寫過一封信,我在信裡告訴她我不太可能馬上回去。那是我這一生鑄成的另一大錯,如果,生活可以重來的話,我會改正的。事實上,我們兩個的開支這麼大,我們一直沒湊夠回去的路費。
44在帕爾默印刷所,他們指定我給沃拉斯頓的《自然宗教》第二版排版。我覺得,沃拉斯頓的論證並不很充分。因此,我就寫了一篇簡短的哲學文章對之做了些評論。那篇文章的題目是《論自由與貧困,快樂與痛苦》。我把這篇短文獻給我的朋友拉爾夫,並印了一些。這使帕爾默先生認為我值得尊重,他把我當成了一個聰明有才華的人,雖然他對我其中的一些理論提出了嚴肅的批評,他甚至有些厭惡它們。我印這本小冊子又是一個錯誤。當我住在小不列顛的時候,我認識了一個書商,他的名字叫威爾科克斯,他的書店就在隔壁。他收集了很多舊書,那個時候還沒有對外開放的圖書館。我們達成了一個協議,在合理條件下,具體的條件我已經忘了,我可以借走他的任何一本書,然後再歸還。它對我真是一個好事情,我盡量利用它。
45我的那本小冊子不知道通過什麼方式被一個叫做萊昂斯的外科醫生看到了,他是《人類判斷能力的確定性》的作者,我們就這樣認識了。他很看重我,經常來找我談論這些話題。他把我帶到平價街的霍恩斯,那是一家淡啤酒館。在那裡,他把我介紹給《蜜蜂的童話》的作者曼德威博士。曼德威博士在那裡開了一家俱樂部,他是俱樂部的核心人物,他是一個非常風趣幽默的傢伙。萊昂斯還把我介紹給巴特咖啡屋的佩姆頓博士。佩姆頓博士答應什麼時候方便的話會給我機會讓我見薩克·牛頓爵士。我很想有那一天,但那一天從來沒有到來。
46我從新大陸帶了幾件珍品,其中一件是用石棉製成的錢包,那是用火鍛煉而成的。漢斯·斯隆爵士聽說我有這樣的錢包,就來拜訪我,並且邀請我去布魯斯伯廣場的家裡,讓我看他收藏的珍品,他還勸我把我的錢包轉讓給他,成為他的收藏品中的一部分,並付給我一筆可觀的錢來買它。
47在我們住的那個地方還有個年輕的女子住在那裡,我想她是在修道院那裡有個鋪子。她受過良好的教育,通情達理,善解人意,活潑開朗,善於交談。在晚上的時候,拉爾夫讀劇本給她聽,他們的關係逐漸親密起來。她另租了地方住,拉爾夫也跟著去了。他們同居了一段日子,但拉爾夫仍然沒有找到工作,而她的收入又不夠維持他們和她的孩子的生活。所以,拉爾夫決心離開倫敦,試著去鄉村學校找工作。他想他是能夠勝任教師一職的,因為他寫得一手好字,數學和會計都很不錯。但是,他總覺得那是屈就。他覺得自己將來一定會時來運轉,那個時候,他不想別人知道他曾經做過這麼卑賤的工作,所以他改了個名字,叫「富蘭克林」,以表示對我的尊重。因為,不久以後我就收到他的來信,他告訴我他在一個小村子裡教書。我想是在伯克村。在那裡他教10到12個小孩子,每週薪金6便士。他還叫我照顧T夫人,並且希望我寫信給他,收信人是那個地方的老師富蘭克林。
48他繼續不斷地給我寫信,寄來他那個時候正在創作的一篇長篇敘事詩,並且希望我批評指正。我不時地給他一點建議,但更多的時候是勸他不要再在這條路上走了。那個時候正好班揚的諷刺詩出版了,我就抄了詩的大部分給他,那首詩強烈地諷刺了那些沒有希望成功的年輕人愚蠢地追求詩神繆斯的行為。但我做的這些都是徒勞無功的,他的詩仍然被不斷地寄來。同時,T夫人由於拉爾夫的關係失去了她的工作和朋友,生活困苦,經常來找我,借走我自己所能節省的錢。我逐漸喜歡和她在一起,而且那個時候由於沒有宗教的束縛,我覺得自己在她心裡很重要,就想和她有親暱的行為,但她憤怒地拒絕了我(又一個錯誤),並且把我的行為告訴了拉爾夫。這就使得我和拉爾夫之間產生了隔閡。當拉爾夫回到倫敦的時候,他告訴我,我們之間的恩惠從此一筆勾銷。我也就知道我借給他的錢和為他預付的錢都一去不復還了。但是,那也不重要,反正他也沒有還的能力。失去了拉爾夫的友誼,我倒有種如釋重負的感覺。現在,我開始考慮存點錢。為了得到一個更好的工作,我離開了帕爾默印刷所,來到了瓦茨印刷所,就在林肯酒店不遠的地方,是一家比帕爾默印刷所更大的印刷所。我在那裡一直工作到我離開倫敦。
49我剛進入瓦茨印刷所的時候是做的印刷工作,我覺得在這裡有在新大陸工作的時候所沒有的那種體力鍛煉。在這裡,印刷和排字是在一起的。我只喝水,其他的人,大概接近50個,他們都是酒鬼。有的時候,我可以每一隻手拿一排鉛字上下樓梯,但是,其他的人則需要用兩隻手拿一排鉛字。他們對這和其它類似的事情感到很驚奇。我這個喝水的美洲人——他們是這樣稱呼我的,竟然比他們這些喝濃稠啤酒的人還要強壯有力。有一個經常來給我們印刷所送啤酒的男孩。和我一起印刷的一個人,他每天早飯前喝1品脫啤酒,早餐的時候和著麵包與奶酪喝1品脫啤酒,早飯和午飯間喝1品脫啤酒,午飯喝1品脫啤酒,下午大概6點鐘的時候又喝1品脫啤酒,做完工作後再喝1品脫啤酒。我覺得那是很噁心的習慣,但他卻覺得這些都是必須的。因為他覺得,喝濃啤酒才有力量幹活。我盡力想讓他相信,啤酒在身體中產生的力量只跟釀酒時溶於水中的穀物和大麥成正比。在1便士的麵包中所含的麵粉更多,因此,如果他吃1便士的麵包,再喝1品脫的水,那會比他喝1夸脫的啤酒所產生的力量更大。但是,無論我怎樣說,他都照喝他的啤酒。每個週末的時候,他都要從他的工資中拿出4、5先令來付他那個泥漿水。這筆費用我是不用掏的,這些可憐的傢伙總是讓別的東西主宰。
50幾個星期以後,瓦茨讓我去排字間工作,就這樣,我離開了印刷間。排字的工人卻要我支付一筆5先令的啤酒費,這筆錢我在印刷間的時候就付過了,我覺得那是一種敲詐。老闆也這樣認為,他不讓我付這筆錢。我堅持了兩三個星期,他們想開除我的會籍,並在私下裡搞了許多惡作劇。比如,當我離開一會兒的時候,我的鉛字就會被弄亂,頁碼也會被改變。所以這些都被解釋為印刷所裡的魔鬼作祟。他們說,那些沒有得到印刷所裡的人認可的人就會受到鬼魂的作弄,即使他有老闆的保護。我被迫服從,並答應付錢。這件事情讓我知道了得罪和你朝夕相處的人是很愚蠢的。
51現在我終於能和他們和睦相處了,並且很快對他們產生了巨大影響。我建議對印刷的規矩做一些合理的改動,並且駁倒了所有的反對意見。以我為榜樣,許多工人吃早餐的時候不再把啤酒、奶酪和麵包混在一起吃。因為他們發現和我一樣——吃隔壁鄰居提供的一大碗熱粥,灑上胡椒粉,把麵包弄碎,然後塗上點牛油——這些東西的價格等於1品脫啤酒的價格,也就是3.5便士。這樣的早餐既便宜又吃的好,還可以保持頭腦清醒。那些仍然整天酗酒的人,由於欠錢沒有還,沒有了信用,酒店就不賒酒給他們了,他們就來找我借錢,用他們的話來說,他們已經走投無路了。每到星期六的晚上,我就等著發工資,收回我借給他們的錢,有的時候一個星期有30先令之多。同時,他們也認為我是一個很幽默的人,很會講話。他們因此很敬重我。我從來不缺勤(因為我從來不用請假做禮拜,我不是教徒),老闆也因此很喜歡我。由於我做事的速度很快,老闆總是把急件交給我做,待遇經常要高一點。這樣,我的生活就過得越來越舒適了。
Part2
1Ihavebeenthemoreparticularinthisdescriptionofmyjourney,andshallbesoofmyfirstentryintothatcity,thatyoumayinyourmindcomparesuchunlikelybeginningswiththefigureIhavesincemadethere.Iwasinmyworkingdress,mybestcloathsbeingtocomeroundbysea.Iwasdirtyfrommyjourney;mypocketswerestuff'doutwithshirtsandstockings,andIknewnosoulnorwheretolookforlodging.Iwasfatiguedwithtravelling,rowing,andwantofrest,Iwasveryhungry;andmywholestockofcashconsistedofaDutchdollar,andaboutashillingincopper.ThelatterIgavethepeopleoftheboatformypassage,whoatfirstrefus'dit,onaccountofmyrowing;butIinsistedontheirtakingit.Amanbeingsometimesmoregenerouswhenhehasbutalittlemoneythanwhenhehasplenty,perhapsthro'fearofbeingthoughttohavebutlittle.
2ThenIwalkedupthestreet,gazingabouttillnearthemarket-houseImetaboywithbread.Ihadmademanyamealonbread,and,inquiringwherehegotit,Iwentimmediatelytothebaker'shedirectedmeto,inSecond-street,andask'dforbisket,intendingsuchaswehadinBoston;butthey,itseems,werenotmadeinPhiladelphia.ThenIaskedforathree-pennyloaf,andwastoldtheyhadnonesuch.Sonotconsideringorknowingthedifferenceofmoney,andthegreatercheapnessnorthenamesofhisbread,Imadehimgivemethree-pennyworthofanysort.Hegaveme,accordingly,threegreatpuffyrolls.Iwassurpriz'datthequantity,buttookit,and,havingnoroominmypockets,walk'doffwitharollundereacharm,andeatingtheother.ThusIwentupMarket-streetasfarasFourth-street,passingbythedoorofMr.Read,myfuturewife'sfather;whenshe,standingatthedoor,sawme,andthoughtImade,asIcertainlydid,amostawkward,ridiculousappearance.ThenIturnedandwentdownChestnut-streetandpartofWalnut-street,eatingmyrollalltheway,and,corninground,foundmyselfagainatMarket-streetwharf,neartheboatIcamein,towhichIwentforadraughtoftheriverwater;and,beingfilledwithoneofmyrolls,gavetheothertwotoawomanandherchildthatcamedowntheriverintheboatwithus,andwerewaitingtogofarther.
3Thusrefreshed,Iwalkedagainupthestreet,whichbythistimehadmanyclean-dressedpeopleinit,whowereallwalkingthesameway.Ijoinedthem,andtherebywasledintothegreatmeeting-houseoftheQuakersnearthemarket.Isatdownamongthem,and,afterlookingroundawhileandhearingnothingsaid,beingverydrowsythro'laborandwantofresttheprecedingnight,Ifellfastasleep,andcontinuedsotillthemeetingbrokeup,whenonewaskindenoughtorouseme.Thiswas,therefore,thefirsthouseIwasin,orsleptin,inPhiladelphia.
4Walkingdownagaintowardtheriver,and,lookinginthefacesofpeople,ImetayoungQuakerman,whosecountenanceIlik'd,and,accostinghim,requestedhewouldtellmewhereastrangercouldgetlodging.WewerethennearthesignoftheThreeMariners."Here,"sayshe,"isoneplacethatentertainsstrangers,butitisnotareputablehouse;iftheewiltwalkwithme,I'llshowtheeabetter."HebroughtmetotheCrookedBilletinWater-street.HereIgotadinner;and,whileIwaseatingit,severalslyquestionswereaskedme,asitseemedtobesuspectedfrommyyouthandappearance,thatImightbesomerunaway.
5Afterdinner,mysleepinessreturn'd,andbeingshowntoabed,Ilaydownwithoutundressing,andslepttillsixintheevening,wascall'dtosupper,wenttobedagainveryearly,andsleptsoundlytillnextmorning.ThenImademyselfastidyasIcould,andwenttoAndrewBradfordtheprinter's.Ifoundintheshoptheoldmanhisfather,whomIhadseenatNewYork,andwho,travellingonhorseback,hadgottoPhiladelphiabeforeme.Heintroduc'dmetohisson,whoreceiv'dmecivilly,gavemeabreakfast,buttoldmehedidnotatpresentwantahand,beinglatelysuppli'dwithone;buttherewasanotherprinterintown,latelysetup,oneKeimer,who,perhaps,mightemployme;ifnot,Ishouldbewelcometolodgeathishouse,andhewouldgivemealittleworktodonowandthentillfullerbusinessshouldoffer.
6Theoldgentlemansaidhewouldgowithmetothenewprinter;andwhenwefoundhim,"Neighbor,"saysBradford,"Ihavebroughttoseeyouayoungmanofyourbusiness;perhapsyoumaywantsuchaone."Heask'dmeafewquestions,putacomposingstickinmyhandtoseehowIwork'd,andthensaidhewouldemploymesoon,thoughhehadjustthennothingformetodo;and,takingoldBradford,whomhehadneverseenbefore,tobeoneofthetown'speoplethathadagoodwillforhim,enter'dintoaconversationonhispresentundertakingandprojects;whileBradford,notdiscoveringthathewastheotherprinter'sfather,onKeimer'ssayingheexpectedsoontogetthegreatestpartofthebusinessintohisownhands,drewhimonbyartfulquestions,andstartinglittledoubts,toexplainallhisviews,whatinterestshereli'don,andinwhatmannerheintendedtoproceed.I,whostoodbyandheardall,sawimmediatelythatoneofthemwasacraftyoldsophister,andtheotheramerenovice.BradfordleftmewithKeimer,whowasgreatlysurpris'dwhenItoldhimwhotheoldmanwas.
7Keimer'sprinting-house,Ifound,consistedofanoldshatter'dpress,andonesmall,worn-outfontofEnglishwhichhewasthenusinghimself,composinganElegyonAquilaRose,beforementioned,aningeniousyoungman,ofexcellentcharacter,muchrespectedinthetown,clerkoftheAssembly,andaprettypoet.Keimermadeversestoo,butveryindifferently.Hecouldnotbesaidtowritethem,forhismannerwastocomposetheminthetypesdirectlyoutofhishead.Sotherebeingnocopy,butonepairofcases,andtheElegylikelytorequirealltheletter,noonecouldhelphim.Iendeavor'dtoputhispress(whichhehadnotyetus'd,andofwhichheunderstoodnothing)intoorderfittobework'dwith;and,promisingtocomeandprintoffhisElegyassoonasheshouldhavegotitready,Ireturn'dtoBradford's,whogavemealittlejobtodoforthepresent,andthereIlodgedanddieted,Afewdaysafter,KeimersentformetoprintofftheElegy.Andnowhehadgotanotherpairofcases,andapamphlettoreprint,onwhichhesetmetowork.
8ThesetwoprintersIfoundpoorlyqualifiedfortheirbusiness.Bradfordhadnotbeenbredtoit,andwasveryilliterate;andKeimer,tho'somethingofascholar,wasamerecompositor,knowingnothingofpresswork.HehadbeenoneoftheFrenchprophets,andcouldacttheirenthusiasticagitations.Atthistimehedidnotprofessanyparticularreligion,butsomethingofallonoccasion;wasveryignorantoftheworld,andhad,asIafterwardfound,agooddealoftheknaveinhiscomposition.HedidnotlikemylodgingatBradford'swhileIwork'dwithhim.Hehadahouse,indeed,butwithoutfurniture,sohecouldnotlodgeme;buthegotmealodgingatMr.Read's,beforementioned,whowastheownerofhishouse;and,mychestandclothesbeingcomebythistime,ImaderatheramorerespectableappearanceintheeyesofMissReadthanIhaddonewhenshefirsthappen'dtoseemeeatingmyrollinthestreet.
9Ibegannowtohavesomeacquaintanceamongtheyoungpeopleofthetown,thatwereloversofreading,withwhomIspentmyeveningsverypleasantly;andgainingmoneybymyindustryandfrugality,Ilivedveryagreeably,forgettingBostonasmuchasIcould,andnotdesiringthatanythereshouldknowwhereIresided,exceptmyfriendCollins,whowasinmysecret,andkeptitwhenIwrotetohim.Atlength,anincidenthappenedthatsentmebackagainmuchsoonerthanIhadintended.Ihadabrother-in-law,RobertHolmes,masterofasloopthattradedbetweenBostonandDelaware.HebeingatNewcastle,fortymilesbelowPhiladelphia,heardthereofme,andwrotemealettermentioningtheconcernofmyfriendsinBostonatmyabruptdeparture,assuringmeoftheirgoodwilltome,andthateverythingwouldbeaccommodatedtomymindifIwouldreturn,towhichheexhortedmeveryearnestly.Iwroteananswertohisletter,thank'dhimforhisadvice,butstatedmyreasonsforquittingBostonfullyandinsuchalightastoconvincehimIwasnotsowrongashehadapprehended.
10SirWilliamKeith,governoroftheprovince,wasthenatNewcastle,andCaptainHolmes,happeningtobeincompanywithhimwhenmylettercametohand,spoketohimofme,andshow'dhimtheletter.Thegovernorreadit,andseem'dsurpris'dwhenhewastoldmyage.HesaidIappear'dayoungmanofpromisingparts,andthereforeshouldbeencouraged;theprintersatPhiladelphiawerewretchedones;and,ifIwouldsetupthere,hemadenodoubtIshouldsucceed;forhispart,hewouldprocuremethepublicbusiness,anddomeeveryotherserviceinhispower.Thismybrother-in-lawafterwardstoldmeinBoston,butIknewasyetnothingofit;when,oneday,KeimerandIbeingatworktogethernearthewindow,wesawthegovernorandanothergentleman(whichprovedtobeColonelFrench,ofNewcastle),finelydress'd,comedirectlyacrossthestreettoourhouse,andheardthematthedoor.
11Keimerrandownimmediately,thinkingitavisittohim;butthegovernorinquir'dforme,cameup,andwithacondescensionofpolitenessIhadbeenquiteunus'dto,madememanycompliments,desiredtobeacquaintedwithme,blam'dmekindlyfornothavingmademyselfknowntohimwhenIfirstcametotheplace,andwouldhavemeawaywithhimtothetavern,wherehewasgoingwithColonelFrenchtotaste,ashesaid,someexcellentMadeira.Iwasnotalittlesurprised,andKeimerstar'dlikeapigpoison'd.Iwent,however,withthegovernorandColonelFrenchtoatavern,atthecornerofThird-street,andovertheMadeirahepropos'dmysettingupmybusiness,laidbeforemetheprobabilitiesofsuccess,andbothheandColonelFrenchassur'dmeIshouldhavetheirinterestandinfluenceinprocuringthepublicbusinessofbothgovernments.Onmydoubtingwhethermyfatherwouldassistmeinit,SirWilliamsaidhewouldgivemealettertohim,inwhichhewouldstatetheadvantages,andhedidnotdoubtofprevailingwithhim.SoitwasconcludedIshouldreturntoBostoninthefirstvessel,withthegovernor'sletterrecommendingmetomyfather.Inthemeantimetheintentionwastobekeptasecret,andIwentonworkingwithKeimerasusual,thegovernorsendingformenowandthentodinewithhim,averygreathonorIthoughtit,andconversingwithmeinthemostaffable,familiar,andfriendlymannerimaginable.
12AbouttheendofApril,1724,alittlevesseloffer'dforBoston.ItookleaveofKeimerasgoingtoseemyfriends.Thegovernorgavemeanampleletter,sayingmanyflatteringthingsofmetomyfather,andstronglyrecommendingtheprojectofmysettingupatPhiladelphiaasathingthatmustmakemyfortune.Westruckonashoalingoingdownthebay,andsprungaleak;wehadablusteringtimeatsea,andwereoblig'dtopumpalmostcontinually,atwhichItookmyturn.Wearriv'dsafe,however,atBostoninaboutafortnight.Ihadbeenabsentsevenmonths,andmyfriendshadheardnothingofme;formybr.Holmeswasnotyetreturn'd,andhadnotwrittenaboutme.Myunexpectedappearancesurpriz'dthefamily;allwere,however,verygladtoseeme,andmademewelcome,exceptmybrother.Iwenttoseehimathisprinting-house.Iwasbetterdress'dthaneverwhileinhisservice,havingagenteelnewsuitfromheadtofoot,awatch,andmypocketslin'dwithnearfivepoundssterlinginsilver.Hereceiv'dmenotveryfrankly,look'dmeallover,andturn'dtohisworkagain.
13ThejourneymenwereinquisitivewhereIhadbeen,whatsortofacountryitwas,andhowIlik'dit.Iprais'ditmuch,thehappylifeIledinit,expressingstronglymyintentionofreturningtoit;and,oneofthemaskingwhatkindofmoneywehadthere,Iproduc'dahandfulofsilver,andspreaditbeforethem,whichwasakindofraree-showtheyhadnotbeenus'dto,paperbeingthemoneyofBoston.ThenItookanopportunityoflettingthemseemywatch;and,lastly(mybrotherstillgrumandsullen),Igavethemapieceofeighttodrink,andtookmyleave.Thisvisitofmineoffendedhimextreamly;for,whenmymothersometimeafterspoketohimofareconciliation,andofherwishestoseeusongoodtermstogether,andthatwemightliveforthefutureasbrothers,hesaidIhadinsultedhiminsuchamannerbeforehispeoplethathecouldneverforgetorforgiveit.Inthis,however,hewasmistaken.
14Myfatherreceivedthegovernor'sletterwithsomeapparentsurprise,butsaidlittleofittomeforsomedays,whenCapt.Holmesreturningheshowedittohim,ask'dhimifheknewKeith,andwhatkindofmanhewas;addinghisopinionthathemustbeofsmalldiscretiontothinkofsettingaboyupinbusinesswhowantedyetthreeyearsofbeingatman'sestate.Holmessaidwhathecouldinfavoroftheproject,butmyfatherwasclearintheimproprietyofit,andatlastgaveaflatdenialtoit.ThenhewroteacivillettertoSirWilliam,thankinghimforthepatronagehehadsokindlyofferedme,butdecliningtoassistmeasyetinsettingup,Ibeing,inhisopinion,tooyoungtobetrustedwiththemanagementofabusinesssoimportant,andforwhichthepreparationmustbesoexpensive.
15MyfriendandcompanionCollins,whowasaclerkinthepost-office,pleas'dwiththeaccountIgavehimofmynewcountry,determinedtogothitheralso;and,whileIwaitedformyfather'sdetermination,hesetoutbeforemebylandtoRhodeIsland,leavinghisbooks,whichwereaprettycollectionofmathematicksandnaturalphilosophy,tocomewithmineandmetoNewYork,wherehepropos'dtowaitforme.
16Myfather,tho'hedidnotapproveSirWilliam'sproposition,wasyetpleas'dthatIhadbeenabletoobtainsoadvantageousacharacterfromapersonofsuchnotewhereIhadresided,andthatIhadbeensoindustriousandcarefulastoequipmyselfsohandsomelyinsoshortatime;therefore,seeingnoprospectofanaccommodationbetweenmybrotherandme,hegavehisconsenttomyreturningagaintoPhiladelphia,advis'dmetobehaverespectfullytothepeoplethere,endeavortoobtainthegeneralesteem,andavoidlampooningandlibeling,towhichhethoughtIhadtoomuchinclination;tellingme,thatbysteadyindustryandaprudentparsimonyImightsaveenoughbythetimeIwasone-and-twentytosetmeup;andthat,ifIcamenearthematter,hewouldhelpmeoutwiththerest.ThiswasallIcouldobtain,exceptsomesmallgiftsastokensofhisandmymother'slove,whenIembark'dagainforNewYork,nowwiththeirapprobationandtheirblessing.
17ThesloopputtinginatNewport,RhodeIsland,IvisitedmybrotherJohn,whohadbeenmarriedandsettledtheresomeyears.Hereceivedmeveryaffectionately,forhealwayslov'dme.Afriendofhis,oneVernon,havingsomemoneyduetohiminPensilvania,aboutthirty-fivepoundscurrency,desiredIwouldreceiveitforhim,andkeepittillIhadhisdirectionswhattoremititin.Accordingly,hegavemeanorder.Thisafterwardsoccasion'dmeagooddealofuneasiness.
18AtNewportwetookinanumberofpassengersforNewYork,amongwhichweretwoyoungwomen,companions,andagrave,sensible,matron-likeQuakerwoman,withherattendants.Ihadshownanobligingreadinesstodohersomelittleservices,whichimpress'dherIsupposewithadegreeofgoodwilltowardme;therefore,whenshesawadailygrowingfamiliaritybetweenmeandthetwoyoungwomen,whichtheyappear'dtoencourage,shetookmeaside,andsaid:"Youngman,Iamconcern'dforthee,asthouhasnofriendwiththee,anseemsnottoknowmuchoftheworld,orofthesnaresyouthisexpos'dto;dependuponit,thoseareverybadwomen;Icanseeitinalltheiractions;andiftheeartnotuponthyguard,theywilldrawtheeintosomedanger;theyarestrangerstothee,andIadvisethee,inafriendlyconcernforthywelfare,tohavenoacquaintancewiththem."AsIseem'datfirstnottothinksoillofthemasshedid,shementionedsomethingsshehadobserv'dandheardthathadescap'dmynotice,butnowconvinc'dmeshewasright.Ithank'dherforherkindadvice,andpromis'dtofollowit.Whenwearriv'datNewYork,theytoldmewheretheyliv'd,andinvitedmetocomeandseethem;butIavoidedit,anditwaswellIdid;forthenextdaythecaptainmiss'dasilverspoonandsomeotherthings,thathadbeentakenoutofhiscabbin,and,knowingthatthesewereacoupleofstrumpets,hegotawarranttosearchtheirlodgings,foundthestolengoods,andhadthethievespunish'd.So,tho'wehadescap'dasunkenrock,whichwescrap'duponinthepassage,Ithoughtthisescapeofrathermoreimportancetome.
19AtNewYorkIfoundmyfriendCollins,whohadarriv'dtheresometimebeforeme.Wehadbeenintimatefromchildren,andhadreadthesamebookstogether;buthehadtheadvantageofmoretimeforreadingandstudying,andawonderfulgeniusformathematicallearning,inwhichhefaroutstriptme.WhileIliv'dinBostonmostofmyhoursofleisureforconversationwerespentwithhim,andhecontinu'dasoberaswellasanindustriouslad;wasmuchrespectedforhislearningbyseveraloftheclergyandothergentlemen,andseemedtopromisemakingagoodfigureinlife.But,duringmyabsence,hehadacquir'dahabitofsottingwithbrandy;andIfoundbyhisownaccount,andwhatIheardfromothers,thathehadbeendrunkeverydaysincehisarrivalatNewYork,andbehav'dveryoddly.Hehadgam'd,too,andlosthismoney,sothatIwasoblig'dtodischargehislodgings,anddefrayhisexpensestoandatPhiladelphia,whichprov'dextremelyinconvenienttome.
20ThethengovernorofNewYork,Burnet(sonofBishopBurnet),hearingfromthecaptainthatayoungman,oneofhispassengers,hadagreatmanybooks,desir'dhewouldbringmetoseehim.Iwaiteduponhimaccordingly,andshouldhavetakenCollinswithmebutthathewasnotsober.Thegov'r.treatedmewithgreatcivility,show'dmehislibrary,whichwasaverylargeone,andwehadagooddealofconversationaboutbooksandauthors.Thiswasthesecondgovernorwhohaddonemethehonortotakenoticeofme;which,toapoorboylikeme,wasverypleasing.
21WeproceededtoPhiladelphia.IreceivedonthewayVernon'smoney,withoutwhichwecouldhardlyhavefinish'dourjourney.Collinswishedtobeemploy'dinsomecounting-house,but,whethertheydiscover'dhisdrammingbyhisbreath,orbyhisbehaviour,tho'hehadsomerecommendations,hemetwithnosuccessinanyapplication,andcontinu'dlodgingandboardingatthesamehousewithme,andatmyexpense.KnowingIhadthatmoneyofVernon's,hewascontinuallyborrowingofme,stillpromisingrepaymentassoonasheshouldbeinbusiness.AtlengthhehadgotsomuchofitthatIwasdistress'dtothinkwhatIshoulddoincaseofbeingcall'dontoremitit.
22Hisdrinkingcontinu'd,aboutwhichwesometimesquarrell'd;,for,whenalittleintoxicated,hewasveryfractious.Once,inaboatontheDelawarewithsomeotheryoungmen,herefusedtorowinhisturn."Iwillberow'dhome,"sayshe."Wewillnotrowyou,"saysI."Youmust,orstayallnightonthewater,"sayshe,"justasyouplease."Theotherssaid,"Letusrow;whatsignifiesit?"
23But,mymindbeingsouredwithhisotherconduct,Icontinu'dtorefuse.Sohesworehewouldmakemerow,orthrowmeoverboard;andcomingalong,steppingonthethwarts,towardme,whenhecameupandstruckatme,Iclappedmyhandunderhiscrutch,and,rising,pitchedhimhead-foremostintotheriver.Iknewhewasagoodswimmer,andsowasunderlittleconcernabouthim;butbeforehecouldgetroundtolayholdoftheboat,wehadwithafewstrokespull'dheroutofhisreach;andeverwhenhedrewneartheboat,weask'difhewouldrow,strikingafewstrokestoslideherawayfromhim.Hewasreadytodiewithvexation,andobstinatelywouldnotpromisetorow.However,seeinghimatlastbeginningtotire,weliftedhiminandbroughthimhomedrippingwetintheevening.Wehardlyexchang'dacivilwordafterwards,andaWestIndiacaptain,whohadacommissiontoprocureatutorforthesonsofagentlemanatBarbadoes,happeningtomeetwithhim,agreedtocarryhimthither.Heleftmethen,promisingtoremitmethefirstmoneyheshouldreceiveinordertodischargethedebt;butIneverheardofhimafter.
24ThebreakingintothismoneyofVernon'swasoneofthefirstgreaterrataofmylife;andthisaffairshow'dthatmyfatherwasnotmuchoutinhisjudgmentwhenhesuppos'dmetooyoungtomanagebusinessofimportance.ButSirWilliam,onreadinghisletter,saidhewastooprudent.Therewasgreatdifferenceinpersons;anddiscretiondidnotalwaysaccompanyyears,norwasyouthalwayswithoutit."Andsincehewillnotsetyouup,"sayshe,"Iwilldoitmyself.GivemeaninventoryofthethingsnecessarytobehadfromEngland,andIwillsendforthem.Youshallrepaymewhenyouareable;Iamresolv'dtohaveagoodprinterhere,andIamsureyoumustsucceed."Thiswasspokenwithsuchanappearanceofcordiality,thatIhadnottheleastdoubtofhismeaningwhathesaid.Ihadhithertokeptthepropositionofmysettingup,asecretinPhiladelphia,andIstillkeptit.HadltbeenknownthatIdependedonthegovernor,probablysomefriend,thatknewhimbetter,wouldhaveadvis'dmenottorelyonhim,asIafterwardshearditashisknowncharactertobeliberalofpromiseswhichhenevermeanttokeep.Yet,unsolicitedashewasbyme,howcouldIthinkhisgenerousoffersinsincere?Ibeliev'dhimoneofthebestmenintheworld.
25Ipresentedhimaninventoryofalittleprint'g-house,amountingbymycomputationtoaboutonehundredpoundssterling.Helik'dit,butask'dmeifmybeingonthespotinEnglandtochusethetypes,andseethateverythingwasgoodofthekind,mightnotbeofsomeadvantage."Then,"sayshe,"whenthere,youmaymakeacquaintances,andestablishcorrespondencesinthebooksellingandstationeryway."Iagreedthatthismightbeadvantageous."Then,"sayshe,"getyourselfreadytogowithAnnis;"whichwastheannualship,andtheonlyoneatthattimeusuallypassingbetweenLondonandPhiladelphia.ButitwouldbesomemonthsbeforeAnnissail'd,soIcontinu'dworkingwithKeimer,frettingaboutthemoneyCollinshadgotfromme,andindailyapprehensionsofbeingcall'duponbyVernon,which,however,didnothappenforsomeyearsafter.
26IbelieveIhaveomittedmentioningthat,inmyfirstvoyagefromBoston,beingbecalm'doffBlockIsland,ourpeoplesetaboutcatchingcod,andhauledupagreatmany.HithertoIhadstucktomyresolutionofnoteatinganimalfood,andonthisoccasionconsider'd,withmymasterTryon,thetakingeveryfishasakindofunprovokedmurder,sincenoneofthemhad,orevercoulddousanyinjurythatmightjustifytheslaughter.Allthisseemedveryreasonable.ButIhadformerlybeenagreatloveroffish,and,whenthiscamehotoutofthefrying-pan,itsmeltadmirablywell.Ibalanc'dsometimebetweenprincipleandinclination,tillIrecollectedthat,whenthefishwereopened,Isawsmallerfishtakenoutoftheirstomachs;thenthoughtI,"Ifyoueatoneanother,Idon'tseewhywemayn'teatyou."SoIdin'duponcodveryheartily,andcontinuedtoeatwithotherpeople,returningonlynowandthenoccasionallytoavegetablediet.Soconvenientathingitistobeareasonablecreature,sinceitenablesonetofindormakeareasonforeverythingonehasamindtodo.
27KeimerandIliv'donaprettygoodfamiliarfooting,andagreedtolerablywell,forhesuspectednothingofmysettingup.Heretainedagreatdealofhisoldenthusiasmsandlov'dargumentation.Wethereforehadmanydisputations.IusedtoworkhimsowithmySocraticmethod,andhadtrepann'dhimsooftenbyquestionsapparentlysodistantfromanypointwehadinhand,andyetbydegreesleadtothepoint,andbroughthimintodifficultiesandcontradictions,thatatlasthegrewridiculouslycautious,andwouldhardlyanswermethemostcommonquestion,withoutaskingfirst,"Whatdoyouintendtoinferfromthat?"However,itgavehimsohighanopinionofmyabilitiesintheconfutingway,thatheseriouslyproposedmybeinghiscolleagueinaprojecthehadofsettingupanewsect.Hewastopreachthedoctrines,andIwastoconfoundallopponents.Whenhecametoexplainwithmeuponthedoctrines,IfoundseveralconundrumswhichIobjectedto,unlessImighthavemywayalittletoo,andintroducesomeofmine.
28Keimerworehisbeardatfulllength,becausesomewhereintheMosaiclawitissaid,"Thoushaltnotmarthecornersofthybeard."HelikewisekepttheSeventhday,Sabbath;andthesetwopointswereessentialswithhim.Idislik'dboth;butagreedtoadmitthemuponconditionofhisadoptingthedoctrineofusingnoanimalfood."Idoubt,"saidhe,"myconstitutionwillnotbearthat."Iassur'dhimitwould,andthathewouldbethebetterforit.Hewasusuallyagreatglutton,andIpromisedmyselfsomediversioninhalfstarvinghim.Heagreedtotrythepractice,ifIwouldkeephimcompany.Ididso,andwehelditforthreemonths.Wehadourvictualsdress'd,andbroughttousregularlybyawomanintheneighborhood,whohadfrommealistoffortydishestobeprepar'dforusatdifferenttimes,inallwhichtherewasneitherfish,flesh,norfowl,andthewhimsuitedmethebetteratthistimefromthecheapnessofit,notcostingusaboveeighteenpencesterlingeachperweek.IhavesincekeptseveralLentsmoststrictly,leavingthecommondietforthat,andthatforthecommon,abruptly,withouttheleastinconvenience,sothatIthinkthereislittleintheadviceofmakingthosechangesbyeasygradations.Iwentonpleasantly,butpoorKeimersufferedgrievously,tiredoftheproject,long'dfortheflesh-potsofEgypt,andorder'daroastpig.Heinvitedmeandtwowomenfriendstodinewithhim;but,itbeingbroughttoosoonupontable,hecouldnotresistthetemptation,andatethewholebeforewecame.
29IhadmadesomecourtshipduringthistimetoMissRead.Ihadagreatrespectandaffectionforher,andhadsomereasontobelieveshehadthesameforme;but,asIwasabouttotakealongvoyage,andwewerebothveryyoung,onlyalittleaboveeighteen,itwasthoughtmostprudentbyhermothertopreventourgoingtoofaratpresent,asamarriage,ifitwastotakeplace,wouldbemoreconvenientaftermyreturn,whenIshouldbe,asIexpected,setupinmybusiness.Perhaps,too,shethoughtmyexpectationsnotsowellfoundedasIimaginedthemtobe.
30MychiefacquaintancesatthistimewereCharlesOsborne,JosephWatson,andJamesRalph,allloversofreading.Thetwofirstwereclerkstoaneminentscrivenerorconveyancerinthetown,CharlesBrogden;theotherwasclerktoamerchant.Watsonwasapious,sensibleyoungman,ofgreatintegrity;theothersrathermorelaxintheirprinciplesofreligion,particularlyRalph,who,aswellasCollins,hadbeenunsettledbyme,forwhichtheybothmademesuffer.Osbornewassensible,candid,frank;sincereandaffectionatetohisfriends;but,inliterarymatters,toofondofcriticising.Ralphwasingenious,genteelinhismanners,andextremelyeloquent;IthinkIneverknewaprettiertalker.Bothofthemgreatadmirersofpoetry,andbegantotrytheirhandsinlittlepieces.ManypleasantwalkswefourhadtogetheronSundaysintothewoods,nearSchuylkill,wherewereadtooneanother,andconferr'donwhatweread.
31Ralphwasinclin'dtopursuethestudyofpoetry,notdoubtingbuthemightbecomeeminentinit,andmakehisfortunebyit,allegingthatthebestpoetsmust,whentheyfirstbegantowrite,makeasmanyfaultsashedid.Osbornedissuadedhim,assur'dhimhehadnogeniusforpoetry,andadvis'dhimtothinkofnothingbeyondthebusinesshewasbredto;that,inthemercantileway,tho'hehadnostock,hemight,byhisdiligenceandpunctuality,recommendhimselftoemploymentasafactor,andintimeacquirewherewithtotradeonhisownaccount.Iapprov'dtheamusingone'sselfwithpoetrynowandthen,sofarastoimproveone'slanguage,butnofarther.
32Onthisitwaspropos'dthatweshouldeachofus,atournextmeeting,produceapieceofourowncomposing,inordertoimprovebyourmutualobservations,criticisms,andcorrections.Aslanguageandexpressionwerewhatwehadinview,weexcludedallconsiderationsofinventionbyagreeingthatthetaskshouldbeaversionoftheeighteenthPsalm,whichdescribesthedescentofaDeity.Whenthetimeofourmeetingdrewnigh,Ralphcalledonmefirst,andletmeknowhispiecewasready.ItoldhimIhadbeenbusy,and,havinglittleinclination,haddonenothing.Hethenshow'dmehispieceformyopinion,andImuchapprov'dit,asitappear'dtometohavegreatmerit."Now,"sayshe,"Osborneneverwillallowtheleastmeritinanythingofmine,butmakes1000criticismsoutofmereenvy.Heisnotsojealousofyou;Iwish,therefore,youwouldtakethispiece,andproduceitasyours;Iwillpretendnottohavehadtime,andsoproducenothing.Weshallthenseewhathewillsaytoit."Itwasagreed,andIimmediatelytranscrib'dit,thatitmightappearinmyownhand.
33Wemet;Watson'sperformancewasread;thereweresomebeautiesinit,butmanydefects.Osborne'swasread;itwasmuchbetter;Ralphdiditjustice;remarkedsomefaults,butapplaudedthebeauties.Hehimselfhadnothingtoproduce.Iwasbackward;seemeddesirousofbeingexcused;hadnothadsufficienttimetocorrect,etc.;butnoexcusecouldbeadmitted;produceImust.Itwasreadandrepeated;WatsonandOsbornegaveupthecontest,andjoin'dinapplaudingit.Ralphonlymadesomecriticisms,andpropos'dsomeamendments;butIdefendedmytext.OsbornewasagainstRalph,andtoldhimhewasnobetteracriticthanpoet,sohedropttheargument.Astheytwowenthometogether,Osborneexpressedhimselfstillmorestronglyinfavorofwhathethoughtmyproduction;havingrestrain'dhimselfbefore,ashesaid,lestIshouldthinkitflattery."Butwhowouldhaveimagin'd,"saidhe,"thatFranklinhadbeencapableofsuchaperformance;suchpainting,suchforce,suchfire!Hehasevenimprov'dtheoriginal.Inhiscommonconversationheseemstohavenochoiceofwords;hehesitatesandblunders;andyet,goodGod!howhewrites!"Whenwenextmet,Ralphdiscoveredthetrickwehadplaidhim,andOsbornewasalittlelaughtat.
34ThistransactionfixedRalphinhisresolutionofbecomingapoet.IdidallIcouldtodissuadehimfromit,buthecontinuedscribblingversestillPopecuredhim.Hebecame,however,aprettygoodprosewriter.Moreofhimhereafter.But,asImaynothaveoccasionagaintomentiontheothertwo,Ishalljustremarkhere,thatWatsondiedinmyarmsafewyearsafter,muchlamented,beingthebestofourset.OsbornewenttotheWestIndies,wherehebecameaneminentlawyerandmademoney,butdiedyoung.HeandIhadmadeaseriousagreement,thattheonewhohappen'dfirsttodieshould,ifpossible,makeafriendlyvisittotheother,andacquainthimhowhefoundthingsinthatseparatestate.Butheneverfulfill'dhispromise.
35Thegovernor,seemingtolikemycompany,hadmefrequentlytohishouse,andhissettingmeupwasalwaysmention'dasafixedthing.Iwastotakewithmelettersrecommendatorytoanumberofhisfriends,besidestheletterofcredittofurnishmewiththenecessarymoneyforpurchasingthepressandtypes,paper,etc.FortheselettersIwasappointedtocallatdifferenttimes,whentheyweretobeready,butafuturetimewasstillnamed.Thushewentontilltheship,whosedeparturetoohadbeenseveraltimespostponed,wasonthepointofsailing.Then,whenIcall'dtotakemyleaveandreceivetheletters,hissecretary,Dr.Bard,cameouttomeandsaidthegovernorwasextremelybusyinwriting,butwouldbedownatNewcastlebeforetheship,andtheretheletterswouldbedeliveredtome.
36Ralph,thoughmarried,andhavingonechild,haddeterminedtoaccompanymeinthisvoyage.Itwasthoughtheintendedtoestablishacorrespondence,andobtaingoodstoselloncommission;butIfoundafterwards,that,thro'somediscontentwithhiswife'srelations,hepurposedtoleaveherontheirhands,andneverreturnagain.Havingtakenleaveofmyfriends,andinterchang'dsomepromiseswithMissRead,IleftPhiladelphiaintheship,whichanchor'datNewcastle.Thegovernorwasthere;butwhenIwenttohislodging,thesecretarycametomefromhimwiththecivillestmessageintheworld,thathecouldnotthenseeme,beingengagedinbusinessoftheutmostimportance,butshouldsendtheletterstomeonboard,wish'dmeheartilyagoodvoyageandaspeedyreturn,etc.Ireturnedonboardalittlepuzzled,butstillnotdoubting.
37Mr.AndrewHamilton,afamouslawyerofPhiladelphia,hadtakenpassageinthesameshipforhimselfandson,andwithMr.Denham,aQuakermerchant,andMessrs.OnionandRussel,mastersofanironworkinMaryland,hadengag'dthegreatcabin;sothatRalphandIwereforcedtotakeupwithaberthinthesteerage,andnoneonboardknowingus,wereconsideredasordinarypersons.ButMr.Hamiltonandhisson(itwasJames,sincegovernor)return'dfromNewcastletoPhiladelphia,thefatherbeingrecall'dbyagreatfeetopleadforaseizedship;and,justbeforewesail'd,ColonelFrenchcomingonboard,andshowingmegreatrespect,Iwasmoretakennoticeof,and,withmyfriendRalph,invitedbytheothergentlementocomeintothecabin,therebeingnowroom.Accordingly,weremov'dthither.
38UnderstandingthatColonelFrenchhadbroughtonboardthegovernor'sdespatches,Iask'dthecaptainforthoselettersthatweretobeundermycare.Hesaidallwereputintothebagtogetherandhecouldnotthencomeatthem;but,beforewelandedinEngland,Ishouldhaveanopportunityofpickingthemout;soIwassatisfiedforthepresent,andweproceededonourvoyage.Wehadasociablecompanyinthecabin,andliveduncommonlywell,havingtheadditionofallMr.Hamilton'sstores,whohadlaidinplentifully.InthispassageMr.Denhamcontractedafriendshipformethatcontinuedduringhislife.Thevoyagewasotherwisenotapleasantone,aswehadagreatdealofbadweather.
39WhenwecameintotheChannel,thecaptainkepthiswordwithme,andgavemeanopportunityofexaminingthebagforthegovernor'sletters.Ifoundnoneuponwhichmynamewasputasundermycare.Ipickedoutsixorseven,that,bythehandwriting,Ithoughtmightbethepromisedletters,especiallyasoneofthemwasdirectedtoBasket,theking'sprinter,andanothertosomestationer.Wearriv'dinLondonthe24thofDecember,1724.Iwaiteduponthestationer,whocamefirstinmyway,deliveringtheletterasfromGovernorKeith."Idon'tknowsuchaperson,"sayshe;but,openingtheletter,"O!thisisfromRiddlesden.Ihavelatelyfoundhimtobeacompleatrascal,andIwillhavenothingtodowithhim,norreceiveanylettersfromhim."So,puttingtheletterintomyhand,heturn'donhisheelandleftmetoservesomecustomer.Iwassurprizedtofindthesewerenotthegovernor'sletters;and,afterrecollectingandcomparingcircumstances,Ibegantodoubthissincerity.IfoundmyfriendDenham,andopenedthewholeaffairtohim.HeletmeintoKeith'scharacter;toldmetherewasnottheleastprobabilitythathehadwrittenanylettersforme;thatnoone,whoknewhim,hadthesmallestdependenceonhim;andhelaughtatthenotionofthegovernor'sgivingmealetterofcredit,having,ashesaid,nocredittogive.OnmyexpressingsomeconcernaboutwhatIshoulddo,headvisedmetoendeavorgettingsomeemploymentinthewayofmybusiness."Amongtheprintershere,"saidhe,"youwillimproveyourself,andwhenyoureturntoAmerica,youwillsetuptogreateradvantage."
40Webothofushappen'dtoknow,aswellasthestationer,thatRiddlesden,theattorney,wasaveryknave.Hehadhalfruin'dMissRead'sfatherbypersuadinghimtobeboundforhim.Bythisletteritappear'dtherewasasecretschemeonfoottotheprejudiceofHamilton(suppos'dtobethencomingoverwithus);andthatKeithwasconcernedinitwithRiddlesden.Denham,whowasafriendofHamilton'sthoughtheoughttobeacquaintedwithit;so,whenhearriv'dinEngland,whichwassoonafter,partlyfromresentmentandill-willtoKeithandRiddlesden,andpartlyfromgood-willtohim,Iwaitedonhim,andgavehimtheletter.Hethank'dmecordially,theinformationbeingofimportancetohim;andfromthattimehebecamemyfriend,greatlytomyadvantageafterwardsonmanyoccasions.
41Butwhatshallwethinkofagovernor'splayingsuchpitifultricks,andimposingsogrosslyonapoorignorantboy!Itwasahabithehadacquired.Hewish'dtopleaseeverybody;and,havinglittletogive,hegaveexpectations.Hewasotherwiseaningenious,sensibleman,aprettygoodwriter,andagoodgovernorforthepeople,tho'notforhisconstituents,theproprietaries,whoseinstructionshesometimesdisregarded.Severalofourbestlawswereofhisplanningandpassedduringhisadministration.
42RalphandIwereinseparablecompanions.WetooklodgingstogetherinLittleBritainatthreeshillingsandsixpenceperweek,asmuchaswecouldthenafford.Hefoundsomerelations,buttheywerepoor,andunabletoassisthim.HenowletmeknowhisintentionsofremaininginLondon,andthathenevermeanttoreturntoPhiladelphia.Hehadbroughtnomoneywithhim,thewholehecouldmusterhavingbeenexpendedinpayinghispassage.Ihadfifteenpistoles;soheborrowedoccasionallyofmetosubsist,whilehewaslookingoutforbusiness.Hefirstendeavoredtogetintotheplayhouse,believinghimselfqualify'dforanactor;butWilkes,towhomheapply'd,advis'dhimcandidlynottothinkofthatemployment,asitwasimpossiblebeshouldsucceedinit.Thenhepropos'dtoRoberts,apublisherinPaternosterRow,towriteforhimaweeklypaperliketheSpectator,oncertainconditions,whichRobertsdidnotapprove.Thenheendeavoredtogetemploymentasahackneywriter,tocopyforthestationersandlawyersabouttheTemple,butcouldfindnovacancy.
43IimmediatelygotintoworkatPalmer's,thenafamousprinting-houseinBartholomewClose,andhereIcontinu'dnearayear.Iwasprettydiligent,butspentwithRalphagooddealofmyearningsingoingtoplaysandotherplacesofamusement.Wehadtogetherconsumedallmypistoles,andnowjustrubbedonfromhandtomouth.Heseem'dquitetoforgethiswifeandchild,andI,bydegrees,myengagementswithMissRead,towhomIneverwrotemorethanoneletter,andthatwastoletherknowIwasnotlikelysoontoreturn.Thiswasanotherofthegreaterrataofmylife,whichIshouldwishtocorrectifIweretoliveitoveragain.Infact,byourexpenses,Iwasconstantlykeptunabletopaymypassage.
44AtPalmer'sIwasemployedincomposingforthesecondeditionofWollaston'sReligionofNature.Someofhisreasoningsnotappearingtomewellfounded,IwrotealittlemetaphysicalpieceinwhichImaderemarksonthem.Itwasentitled"ADissertationonLibertyandNecessity,PleasureandPain."IinscribedittomyfriendRalph;Iprintedasmallnumber.Itoccasion'dmybeingmoreconsider'dbyMr.Palmerasayoungmanofsomeingenuity,tho'heseriouslyexpostulatedwithmeupontheprinciplesofmypamphlet,whichtohimappear'dabominable.Myprintingthispamphletwasanothererratum.WhileIlodg'dinLittleBritain,ImadeanacquaintancewithoneWilcox,abookseller,whoseshopwasatthenextdoor.Hehadanimmensecollectionofsecond-handbooks.Circulatinglibrarieswerenottheninuse;butweagreedthat,oncertainreasonableterms,whichIhavenowforgotten,Imighttake,read,andreturnanyofhisbooks.ThisIesteem'dagreatadvantage,andImadeasmuchuseofitasIcould.
45MypamphletbysomemeansfallingintothehandsofoneLyons,asurgeon,authorofabookentitledTheInfallibilityofHumanJudgment,itoccasionedanacquaintancebetweenus.Hetookgreatnoticeofme,calledonmeoftentoconverseonthosesubjects,carriedmetotheHorns,apalealehousein—Lane,Cheapside,andintroducedmetoMr.Mandeville,authoroftheFableoftheBees,whohadaclubthere,ofwhichhewasthesoul,beingamostfacetious,entertainingcompanion.Lyons,too,introducedmetoDr.Pemberton,atBatson'sCoffee-house,whopromis'dtogivemeanopportunity,sometimeorother,ofseeingSirIsaacNewton,ofwhichIwasextreamelydesirous;butthisneverhappened.
46Ihadbroughtoverafewcuriosities,amongwhichtheprincipalwasapursemadeoftheasbestos,whichpurifiesbyfire.SirHansSloaneheardofit,cametoseeme,andinvitedmetohishouseinBloomsburySquare,whereheshow'dmeallhiscuriosities,andpersuadedmetolethimaddthattothenumber,forwhichhepaidmehandsomely.
47Inourhousetherelodg'dayoungwoman,amilliner,who,Ithink,hadashopintheCloisters.Shehadbeengenteellybred,wassensibleandlively,andofmostpleasingconversation.Ralphreadplaystoherintheevenings,theygrewintimate,shetookanotherlodging,andhefollowedher.Theyliv'dtogethersometime;but,hebeingstilloutofbusiness,andherincomenotsufficienttomaintainthemwithherchild,hetookaresolutionofgoingfromLondon,totryforacountryschool,whichhethoughthimselfwellqualifiedtoundertake,ashewroteanexcellenthand,andwasamasterofarithmeticandaccounts.This,however,hedeemedabusinessbelowhim,andconfidentoffuturebetterfortune,whenheshouldbeunwillingtohaveitknownthatheoncewassomeanlyemployed,hechangedhisname,anddidmethehonortoassumemine;forIsoonafterhadaletterfromhim,acquaintingmethathewassettledinasmallvillage(inBerkshire,Ithinkitwas,wherehetaughtreadingandwritingtotenoradozenboys,atsixpenceeachperweek),recommendingMrs.T—tomycare,anddesiringmetowritetohim,directingforMr.Franklin,schoolmaster,atsuchaplace.
48Hecontinuedtowritefrequently,sendingmelargespecimensofanepicpoemwhichhewasthencomposing,anddesiringmyremarksandcorrections.TheseIgavehimfromtimetotime,butendeavor'drathertodiscouragehisproceeding.OneofYoung'sSatireswasthenjustpublished.Icopy'dandsenthimagreatpartofit,whichsetinastronglightthefollyofpursuingtheMuseswithanyhopeofadvancementbythem.Allwasinvain;sheetsofthepoemcontinuedtocomebyeverypost.Inthemeantime,Mrs.T—,havingonhisaccountlostherfriendsandbusiness,wasoftenindistresses,andus'dtosendforme,andborrowwhatIcouldsparetohelpheroutofthem.Igrewfondofhercompany,and,beingatthattimeundernoreligiousrestraint,andpresuminguponmyimportancetoher,Iattemptedfamiliarities(anothererratum)whichsherepuls'dwithaproperresentment,andacquaintedhimwithmybehaviour.Thismadeabreachbetweenus;and,whenhereturnedagaintoLondon,heletmeknowhethoughtIhadcancell'dalltheobligationshehadbeenundertome.SoIfoundIwasnevertoexpecthisrepayingmewhatIlenttohim,oradvanc'dforhim.This,however,wasnotthenofmuchconsequence,ashewastotallyunable;andinthelossofhisfriendshipIfoundmyselfrelievedfromaburthen.Inowbegantothinkofgettingalittlemoneybeforehand,and,expectingbetterwork,IleftPalmer'stoworkatWatts's,nearLincoln'sInnFields,astillgreaterprinting-house.HereIcontinuedalltherestofmystayinLondon.
49Atmyfirstadmissionintothisprinting-houseItooktoworkingatpress,imaginingIfeltawantofthebodilyexerciseIhadbeenus'dtoinAmerica,wherepressworkismix'dwithcomposing.Idrankonlywater;theotherworkmen,nearfiftyinnumber,weregreatguzzlersofbeer.Onoccasion,Icarriedupanddownstairsalargeformoftypesineachhand,whenotherscarriedbutoneinbothhands.Theywonderedtosee,fromthisandseveralinstances,thattheWater-American,astheycalledme,wasstrongerthanthemselves,whodrankstrongbeer!Wehadanalehouseboywhoattendedalwaysinthehousetosupplytheworkmen.Mycompanionatthepressdrankeverydayapintbeforebreakfast,apintatbreakfastwithhisbreadandcheese,apintbetweenbreakfastanddinner,apintatdinner,apintintheafternoonaboutsixo'clock,andanotherwhenhehaddonehisday'swork.Ithoughtitadetestablecustom;butitwasnecessary,hesuppos'd,todrinkstrongbeer,thathemightbestrongtolabor.Iendeavoredtoconvincehimthatthebodilystrengthaffordedbybeercouldonlybeinproportiontothegrainorflourofthebarleydissolvedinthewaterofwhichitwasmade;thattherewasmoreflourinapennyworthofbread;andtherefore,ifhewouldeatthatwithapintofwater,itwouldgivehimmorestrengththanaquartofbeer.Hedrankon,however,andhadfourorfiveshillingstopayoutofhiswageseverySaturdaynightforthatmuddlingliquor;anexpenseIwasfreefrom.Andthusthesepoordevilskeepthemselvesalwaysunder.
50Watts,aftersomeweeks,desiringtohavemeinthecomposing-room,Ileftthepressmen;anewbienvenuorsumfordrink,beingfiveshillings,wasdemandedofmebythecompositors.Ithoughtitanimposition,asIhadpaidbelow;themasterthoughtsotoo,andforbadmypayingit.Istoodouttwoorthreeweeks,wasaccordinglyconsideredasanexcommunicate,andhadsomanylittlepiecesofprivatemischiefdoneme,bymixingmysorts,transposingmypages,breakingmymatter,etc.,etc.,ifIwereeversolittleoutoftheroom,andallascribedtothechappelghost,whichtheysaideverhauntedthosenotregularlyadmitted,that,notwithstandingthemaster'sprotection,Ifoundmyselfoblig'dtocomplyandpaythemoney,convinc'dofthefollyofbeingonilltermswiththoseoneistolivewithcontinually.
51Iwasnowonafairfootingwiththem,andsoonacquir'dconsiderableinfluence.Ipropos'dsomereasonablealterationsintheirchappellaws,andcarriedthemagainstallopposition.Frommyexample,agreatpartofthemlefttheirmuddlingbreakfastofbeer,andbread,andcheese,findingtheycouldwithmebesuppli'dfromaneighboringhousewithalargeporringerofhotwater-gruel,sprinkledwithpepper,crumbl'dwithbread,andabitofbutterinit,forthepriceofapintofbeer,viz.,threehalf-pence.Thiswasamorecomfortableaswellascheaperbreakfast,andkepttheirheadsclearer.Thosewhocontinuedsottingwithbeerallday,wereoften,bynotpaying,outofcreditatthealehouse,andus'dtomakeinterestwithmetogetbeer;theirlight,astheyphrasedit,beingout.Iwatch'dthepay-tableonSaturdaynight,andcollectedwhatIstoodengag'dforthem,havingtopaysometimesnearthirtyshillingsaweekontheiraccount.This,andmybeingesteem'daprettygoodriggite,thatis,ajocularverbalsatirist,supportedmyconsequenceinthesociety.Myconstantattendance(InevermakingaSt.Monday)recommendedmetothemaster;andmyuncommonquicknessatcomposingoccasionedmybeingputuponallworkofdispatch,whichwasgenerallybetterpaid.SoIwentonnowveryagreeably.