For some days after that evening, Mr Heathcliff shunned meeting us at meals;
yet he would not consent formally to exclude Hareton and Cathy. He had
an aversion to yielding so completely to his feelings, choosing rather
to absent himself; and eating once in twenty-four hours seemed sufficient
sustenance for him.
One night, after the family were in bed, I heard him go downstairs,
and out at the front door. I did not hear him re-enter, and in the morning
I found he was still away. We were in April then: the weather was sweet
and warm, the grass as green as showers and sun could make it, and the
two dwarf apple trees near the southern wall in full bloom. After breakfast,
Catherine insisted on my bringing a chair and sitting with my work under
the fir trees at the end of the house; and she beguiled Hareton, who had
perfectly recovered from his accident, to dig and arrange her little garden,
which was shifted to that corner by the influence of Joseph's complaints.
I was comfortably revelling in the spring fragrance around, and the beautiful
soft blue overhead, when my young lady, who had run down near the gate
to procure some primrose roots for a border, returned only half laden,
and informed us that Mr Heathcliff was coming in. `And he spoke to me,'
she added, with a perplexed countenance.
"What did he say?' asked Hareton.
`He told me to begone as fast as I could,' she answered. `But
he looked so different from his usual look that I stopped a moment to stare
at him.'
`How?' he inquired.
`Why, almost bright and cheerful. No, almost nothing--very
much excited, and wild and glad!' she replied.
`Night walking amuses him, then,' I remarked, affecting a careless
manner: in reality as surprised as she was, and anxious to ascertain the
truth of her statement; for to see the master looking glad would not be
an everyday spectacle. I framed an excuse to go in. Heathcliff stood at
the open door, he was pale, and he trembled: yet, certainly, he had a strange,
joyful glitter in his eyes, that altered the aspect of his whole face.
`Will you have some breakfast?' I said. `You must be hungry, rambling
about all night!' I wanted to discover where he had been, but I did not
like to ask directly.
`No, I'm not hungry,' he answered, averting his head, and speaking
rather contemptuously, as if he guessed I was trying to divine the occasion
of his good humour.
I felt perplexed: I didn't know whether it were not a proper opportunity
to offer a bit of admonition.
`I don't think it right to wander out of doors,' I observed, `instead
of being in bed: it is not wise, at any rate, this moist season. I dare
say you'll catch a bad cold, or a fever: you have something the matter
with you now!'
`Nothing but what I can bear,' he replied; `and with the greatest
pleasure, provided you'll leave me alone; get in, and don't annoy me.'
I obeyed: and, in passing, I noticed he breathed as fast as a
cat.
`Yes!' I reflected to myself, `we shall have a fit of illness.
I cannot conceive what he has been doing.'
That noon he sat down to dinner with us, and received a heaped-up
plate from my hands, as if he intended to make amends for previous fasting.
`I've neither cold nor fever, Nelly,' he remarked, in allusion
to my morning's speech; `and I'm ready to do justice to the food you give
me.
He took his knife and fork, and was going to commence eating,
when the inclination appeared to become suddenly extinct. He laid them
on the table, looked eagerly towards the window, then rose and went out.
`We saw him walking to and fro in the garden while we concluded our meal,
and Earnshaw said he'd go and ask why he would not dine: he thought we
had grieved him some way.
`Well, is he coming?' cried Catherine, when her cousin returned.
`Nay,' he answered; `but he's not angry: he seemed rare and pleased
indeed; only I made him impatient by speaking to him twice; and then he
bid me be off to you: he wondered how I could want the company of anybody
else.'
I set his plate to keep warm on the fender; and after an hour
or two he re-entered, when the room was clear, in no degree calmer: the
same unnatural--it was unnatural--appearance of joy under his black brows;
the same bloodless hue, and his teeth visible, now and then, in a kind
of smile; his frame shivering, not as one shivers with chill or weakness,
but as a tight-stretched cord vibrates--a strong thrilling, rather than
trembling.
I will ask what is the matter, I thought; or who should? And I
exclaimed:
`Have you heard any good news, Mr Heathcliff? You look uncommonly
animated.'
`Where should good news come from to me?' he said. `I'm animated
with hunger; and, seemingly, I must not eat.'
`Your dinner is here,' I returned; `why won't you get it?'
`I don't want it now;' he muttered hastily; `I'll wait till supper.
And, Nelly, once for all, let me beg you to warn Hareton and the other
away from me. I wish to be troubled by nobody: I wish to have this place
to myself.'
`Is there some new reason for this banishment?' I inquired. `Tell
me why you are so queer, Mr Heathcliff? `Where were you last night? I'm
not putting the question through idle curiosity, but--'
`You are putting the question through very idle curiosity,' he
interrupted, with a laugh. `Yet I'll answer it. Last night I was on the
threshold of hell. Today, I am within sight of my heaven. I have my eyes
on it: hardly three feet to sever me! And now you'd better go! You'll neither
see nor hear anything to frighten you, if you refrain from prying.'
Having swept the hearth and wiped the table, I departed; more
perplexed than ever.
He did not quit the house again that afternoon, and no one intruded
on his solitude; till, at eight o'clock, I deemed it proper, though unsummoned,
to carry a candle and his supper to him. He was leaning against the ledge
of an open lattice, but not looking out: his face was turned to the interior
gloom. The fire had smouldered to ashes; the room was filled with the damp,
mild air of the cloudy evening; and so still, that not only the murmur
of the beck down Gimmerton was distinguishable, but its ripples and its
gurgling over the pebbles, or through the large stones which it could not
cover. I uttered an ejaculation of discontent at seeing the dismal grate,
and commenced shutting the casements, one after another, till I came to
his.
`Must I close this?' I asked, in order to rouse him; for he would
not stir.
The light flashed on his features as I spoke. Oh, Mr Lockwood,
I cannot express what a terrible start I got by the momentary view! Those
deep black eyes! That smile, and ghastly paleness! It appeared to me, not
Mr Heathcliff, but a goblin; and, in my terror, I let the candle bend towards
the wall, and it left me in darkness.
`Yes, close it,' he replied, in his familiar voice. `There, that
is pure awkwardness! Why did you hold the candle horizontally? Be quick,
and bring another.'
I hurried out in a foolish state of dread, and said to Joseph:
`The master wishes you to take him a light and rekindle the fire.'
For I dare not go in myself again just then.
Joseph rattled some fire into the shovel, and went; but he brought
it back immediately, with the supper tray in his other hand, explaining
that Mr Heathcliff was going to bed, and he wanted nothing to eat till
morning. We heard him mount the stairs directly; he did not proceed to
his ordinary chamber, but turned into that with the panelled bed: its window,
as I mentioned before, is wide enough for anybody to get through; and it
struck me that he plotted another midnight excursion, of which he had rather
we had no suspicion.
`Is he a ghoul or a vampire?' I mused. I had read of such hideous
incarnate demons. And then I set myself to reflect how I had tended him
in infancy, and watched him grow to youth, and followed him almost through
his whole course; and what absurd nonsense it was to yield to that sense
of horror. `But where did he come from, the little dark thing, harboured
by a good man to his bane?' muttered Superstition, as I dozed into unconsciousness.
And I began, half dreaming, to weary myself with imagining some fit parentage
for him; and, repeating my waking meditations, I tracked his existence
over again, with grim variations; at last, picturing his death and funeral:
of which, all I can remember is, being exceedingly vexed at having the
task of dictating an inscription for his monument, and consulting the sexton
about it; and, as he had no surname, and we could not `tell his age, we
were obliged to content ourselves with the single word, `Heathcliff'. That
came true: we were. If you enter the kirkyard, you'll read on his headstone,
only that, and the date of his death.
Dawn restored me to common sense. I rose, and went into the garden,
as soon as I could see, to ascertain if there were any footmarks under
his window. There were none. `He has stayed at home~ought, `and he'll be
all right today.' I prepared breakfast for the household, as was my usual
custom, but told Hareton and Catherine to get theirs ere the master came
down, for he lay late. They preferred taking it out of doors, under the
trees, and I set a little table to accommodate them.
On my re-entrance, I found Mr Heathcliff below. He and Joseph
were conversing about some farming business; he gave clear, minute directions
concerning the matter discussed, but he spoke rapidly, and turned his head
continually aside, and had the same excited expression, even more exaggerated.
`When Joseph quitted the room he took his seat in the place he generally
chose, and I put a basin of coffee before him. He drew it nearer, and then
rested his arms on the table, and looked at the opposite wall, as I supposed,
surveying one particular portion, up and down, with glittering, restless
eyes, and with such eager interest that he stopped breathing during half
a minute together.
`Come now, I exclaimed, pushing some bread against his hand, `eat
and drink that, while it is hot: it has been waiting near an hour.'
He didn't notice me, and yet he smiled. I'd rather have seen him
gnash his teeth than smile so.
`Mr Heathcliff! master!' I cried, `don't, for God's sake, stare
as if you saw an unearthly vision.'
`Don't, for God's sake, shout so loud,' he replied. `Turn round,
and tell me, are we by ourselves?'
`Of course,' was my answer; `of course we are.'
Still I involuntarily obeyed him, as if I were not quite sure.
`With a sweep of his hand he cleared a vacant space in front among the
breakfast things, and leant forward to gaze more at his ease.
Now, I perceived he was not looking at the wall; for when I regarded
him alone, it seemed exactly that he gazed at something within two yards'
distance. And whatever it was, it communicated, apparently, both pleasure
and pain in exquisite extremes: at least the anguished, yet raptured, expression
of his countenance suggested that idea. The fancied object was not fixed:
either his eyes pursued it with unwearied diligence, and, even in speaking
to me, were never weaned away. I vainly reminded him of his protracted
abstinence from food: if he stirred to touch anything in compliance with
my entreaties, if he stretched his hand out to get a piece of bread, his
fingers clenched before they reached it, and remained on the table, forgetful
of their aim.
I sat, a model of patience, trying to attract his absorbed attention
from its engrossing speculation; till he grew irritable, and got--up, asking
why I would not allow him to have his own time in taking his meals? and
saying that on the next occasion, I needn't wait: I might set the things
down and go. Having uttered these words he left the house, slowly sauntered
down the garden path, and disappeared through the gate.
The hours crept anxiously by: another evening came. I did not
retire to rest till late, and when I did, I could not sleep. He returned
after midnight, and, instead of going to bed, shut himself into the room
beneath. I listened, and tossed about, and, finally, dressed and descended.
It was too irksome to lie up there, harassing my brain with a hundred idle
misgivings.
I distinguished Mr Heathcliff's step, restlessly measuring the
floor, and he frequently broke the silence by a deep inspiration, resembling
a groan. He muttered detached words also; the only one I could catch was
the name of Catherine, coupled with some wild term of endearment or suffering;
and spoken as one would speak to a person present: low and earnest, and
wrung from the depth of his soul. I had not courage to walk straight into
the apartment; but I desired to divert him from his reverie, and therefore
fell foul of the kitchen fire, stirred it, and began to scrape the cinders.
It drew him forth sooner than I expected. He opened the door immediately,
and said:
`Nelly, come here--is it morning? Come in with your light.'
`It is striking four,' I answered. `You want a candle to take
upstairs: you might have lit one at this fire.'
`No, I don't wish to go upstairs,' he said. `Come in, and kindle
me a fire, and do anything there is to do about the room.'
`I must blow the coals red first, before I can carry any,' I replied,
getting a chair and the bellows.
He roamed to and fro, meantime, in a state approaching distraction;
his heavy sighs succeeding each other so thick as to leave no space for
common breathing between.
"When day breaks I'll send for Green,' he said; `I wish to make
some legal inquiries of him while I can bestow a thought on those matters,
and while I can act calmly. I have not written my will yet; and how to
leave my property I cannot determine. I wish I could annihilate it from
the face of the earth.'
`I would not talk so, Mr Heathcliff,' I interposed. `Let your
will be a while: you'll be spared to repent of your many injustices yet.
I never expected that your nerves would be disordered: they are, at present,
marvellously so, however; and almost entirely through your own fault. The
way you've passed these three last days might knock up a Titan. Do take
some food, and some repose. You need only look at yourself in a glass to
see how you require both. Your cheeks are hollow, and your eyes bloodshot,
like a person starving with hunger and going blind with loss of sleep.'
`It is not my fault that I cannot eat or rest,' he replied. `I
assure you it is through no settled designs. I'll do both as soon as I
possibly can. But you might as well bid a man struggling in the water rest
within arm's length of the shore! I must reach it first, and then I'll
rest. Well, never mind Mr Green: as to repenting of my injustices, I've
done no injustice, and I repent of nothing. I'm too happy; and yet I'm
not happy enough. My soul's bliss kills my body, but does not satisfy itself.'
`Happy, master?' I cried. `Strange happiness! If you would hear
me without being angry, I might offer some advice that would make you happier.
"What is that?' he asked. `Give it.'
`You are aware, Mr Heathcliff,' I said, `that from the time you
were thirteen years old, you have lived a selfish, unchristian life; and
probably hardly had a Bible in your hands during all that period. You must
have forgotten the contents of the book, and you may not have space to
search it now. Could it be hurtful to send for someone--some minister of
any denomination, it does not matter which--to explain it, and show you
how very far you have erred from its precepts; and how unfit you will be
for its heaven, unless a change takes place `before you die?'
`I'm rather obliged than angry, Nelly,' he said, `for you remind
me of the manner that I desire to be buried in. It is to be carried to
the churchyard in the evening. You and Hareton may, if you please, accompany
me: and mind, particularly, to notice that the sexton obeys my directions
concerning the two coffins! No minister need come; nor need anything be
said over me.--I tell you I have nearly attained my heaven; and
that of others is altogether unvalued and uncovered by me.
`And supposing you persevered in your obstinate fast, and died
by that means, and they refused to bury you in the precincts of the kirk?'
I said, shocked at his godless indifference. `How would you like it?'
`They won't do that,' he replied: `if they did, you must have
me removed secretly: and if you neglect it you shall prove, practically,
that the dead are not annihilated!'
As soon as he heard the other members of the family stirring he
retired to his den, and I breathed freer. But in the afternoon, while Joseph
and Hareton were at their work, he came into the kitchen again, and, with
a wild look, bid me come and sit in the house: he wanted somebody with
him. I declined: telling him plainly that his strange talk and manner frightened
me, and I had neither the nerve nor the will to be his companion alone.
`I believe you think me a fiend,' he said, with his dismal laugh:
something too horrible to live under a decent roof.' Then turning to Catherine,
who was there, and who drew behind me at his approach, he added, half sneeringly--`Will
you come, chuck? I'll not hurt you. No! to you I've made myself
worse than the devil. Well, there is one who won't shrink from my
company! By God! she's relentless. Oh, damn it! It's unutterably too much
for flesh and blood to bear--even mine.'
He solicited the society of no one more. At dusk, he went into
his chamber. Through the whole night, and far into the morning, we heard
him groaning and murmuring to himself. Hareton was anxious to enter; but
I bade him fetch Mr Kenneth, and he should go in and see him. When he came,
and I requested admittance and tried to open the door, I found it locked;
and Heathcliff bid us be damned. He was better, and would be left alone;
so the doctor went away.
The following evening was very wet: indeed it poured down till
day-dawn; and, as I took my morning walk round the house, I observed the
master's window swinging open, and the rain driving straight in. He cannot
be in bed, I thought: those showers would drench him through. He must either
be up or out. But I'll make no more ado, I'll go boldly and look.
Having succeeded in obtaining entrance with another key, I ran
to unclose the panels, for the chamber was vacant; quickly pushing them
aside, I peeped in. Mr Heathcliff was there--laid on his back. His eyes
met mine so keen and fierce, I started; and then he seemed to smile. I
could not think him dead: but his face and throat were washed with rain;
the bedclothes dripped, and he was ~ perfectly still. The lattice, flapping
to and fro, had grazed one hand that rested on the sill; no blood trickled
from the broken skin, and when I put my fingers to it, I could doubt no
more: he was dead and stark!
I hasped the window; I combed his black long hair from his forehead;
I tried to close his eyes: to extinguish, if possible, that frightful,
lifelike gaze of exultation before anyone else beheld it. They would not
shut: they seemed to sneer at my attempts: and his parted lips and sharp
white teeth sneered too! Taken with another fit of cowardice, I cried out
for Joseph. Joseph shuffled up and made a noise; but resolutely refused
to meddle with him.
`Th' divil's harried off his soul,' he cried, `and he muh hev
his carcass intuh t' bargain, for ow't Aw care! Ech! what a wicked un he
looks girning at death!' and the old sinner grinned in mockery. I thought
he intended to cut a caper round the bed; but, suddenly composing himself,
he fell on his knees, and raised his hands, and returned thanks that the
lawful master and the ancient stock were restored to their rights.
I felt stunned by the awful event; and my memory unavoidably recurred
to former times with a sort of oppressive sadness. But poor Hareton, the
most wronged, was the only one that really suffered much. He sat by the
corpse all night, weeping in bitter earnest. He pressed its hand, and kissed
the sarcastic savage face that everyone else shrank from contemplating;
and bemoaned him with that strong grief which springs naturally from a
generous heart, though it be tough as tempered steel.
Mr Kenneth was perplexed to pronounce of what disorder the master
died. I concealed the fact of his having swallowed nothing for four days,
fearing it might lead to trouble, and then, I am persuaded, he did not
abstain on purpose: it was the consequence of his strange illness, not
the cause.
`We buried him, to the scandal of the whole neighbourhood, as
he wished. Earnshaw and I, the sexton, and six men to carry the coffin,
comprehended the whole attendance. The six men departed when they had let
it down into the grave: we stayed to see it covered. Hareton, with a streaming
face, dug green sods, and laid them over the brown mould himself: at present
it is as smooth and verdant as its companion mounds--and I hope its tenant
sleeps as soundly. But the country folk, if you ask them, would swear on
the Bible that he walks: there are those who speak to having met
him near the church, and on the moor, and even in this house. Idle tales,
you'll say, and so say I. Yet that old man by the kitchen fire affirms
he has seen two on `em, looking out of his chamber window, on every rainy
night since his death: and an odd thing happened to me about a month ago.
I was going to the Grange one evening--a dark evening, threatening thunder--and,
just at the turn of the Heights, I encountered a little boy with a sheep
and two lambs before him; he was crying terribly; and I supposed the lambs
were skittish, and would not be guided.
"What's the matter, my little man?' I asked.
`There's Heathcliff and a woman, yonder, under t' nab,' he blubbered,
`un' I darnut pass `em.'
I saw nothing; but neither the sheep nor he would go on; so I
bid him take the road lower down. He probably raised the phantoms from
thinking, as he traversed the moors alone, on the nonsense he had heard
his parents and companions repeat. Yet, still, I don't like being out in
the dark now; and I don't like being left by myself in this grim house:
I cannot help it; I shall be glad when they leave it, and shift to the
Grange.
`They are going to the Grange, then,' I said.
`Yes,' answered Mrs Dean, `is soon as they are married, and that
will be on New Year's Day.'
`And who will live here, then?'
`Why, Joseph will take care of the house, and, perhaps, a lad
to keep him company. They will live in the kitchen, and the rest will be
shut up.'
`For the use of such ghosts as choose to inhabit it,' I observed.
`No, Mr Lockwood,' said Nelly, shaking her head. `I believe the
dead are at peace: but it is not right to speak of them with levity.'
At that moment the garden gate swung to; the ramblers were returning.
`They are afraid of nothing,' I grumbled, watching their
approach through the window. `Together they would brave Satan and all his
legions.'
As they stepped on to the doorstones, and halted to take a last
look at the moon--or, more correctly, at each other by her light--I felt
irresistibly impelled to escape them again; and, pressing a remembrance
into the hand of Mrs Dean, and disregarding her expostulations at my rudeness,
I vanished through the kitchen as they opened the house-door; and so should
have confirmed Joseph in his opinion of his fellow-servant's gay indiscretions,
had he not fortunately recognized me for a respectable character by the
sweet ring of a sovereign at his feet.
My walk home was lengthened by a diversion in the direction of
the kirk. `When beneath its walls, I perceived decay had made progress,
even in seven months: many a window showed black gaps deprived of glass;
and slates jutted off, here and there, beyond the right line of the roof,
to be gradually worked off in coming autumn storms.
I sought, and soon discovered, the three headstones on the slope
next the moor: the middle one grey, and half buried in heath: Edgar Linton's
only harmonized by the turf and moss creeping up its foot: Heathcliff's
still bare.
I lingered round them, under that benign sky; watched the moths
fluttering among the heath and harebells, listened to the soft wind breathing
through the grass, and wondered how anyone could ever imagine unquiet slumbers
for the sleepers in that quiet earth.
|