While Miss Linton moped about the park and garden, always silent, and almost
always in tears; and her brother shut himself up among books that he never
opened--wearying, I guessed, with a continual vague expectation that Catherine,
repenting her conduct, would come of her own accord to ask pardon, and
seek a reconciliation--and she fasted pertinaciously, under the
idea, probably, that at every meal, Edgar was ready to choke for her absence,
and pride alone held him from running to cast himself at her feet: I went
about my household duties, convinced that the Grange had but one sensible
soul in its walls, and that lodged in my body. I wasted no condolences
on Miss, nor any expostulations on my mistress; nor did I pay much attention
to the sighs of my master, who yearned to hear his lady's name, since he
might not hear her voice. I determined they should come about as they pleased
for me; and though it was a tiresomely slow process, I began to rejoice
at length in a faint dawn of its progress: as I thought at first.
Mrs Linton, on the third day, unbarred her door, and having finished
the water in her pitcher and decanter, desired a renewed supply, and a
basin of gruel, for she believed she was dying. That I set down as a speech
meant for Edgar's ears; I believed no such thing, so I kept it to myself
and brought her some tea and dry toast. She ate and drank eagerly; and
sank back on her pillow again clenching her hands and groaning. `Oh, I
will die,' she exclaimed, `since no one cares anything about me. I wish
I had not taken that.' Then a good while after I heard her murmur, `No,
I'll not die--he'd be glad--he does not love me at all--he would never
miss me!'
`Did you want anything, ma'am?' I inquired, still preserving my
external composure, in spite of her ghastly countenance, and strange exaggerated
manner.
`What is that apathetic being doing?' she demanded, pushing her
thick entangled locks from her wasted face. `Has he fallen into a lethargy,
or is he dead?'
`Neither,' replied I; `if you mean Mr Linton. He's tolerably well,
I think, though his studies occupy him rather more than they ought: he
is continually among his books, since he has no other society.'
I should not have spoken so, if I had known her true condition,
but I could not get rid of the notion that she acted a part of her disorder.
`Among his books!' she cried, confounded. `And I dying! I on the
brink of the grave! My God! does he know how I'm altered?' continued she,
staring at her reflection in a mirror hanging against the opposite wall.
`Is that Catherine Linton! He imagines me in a pet--in play, perhaps. Cannot
you inform him that it is frightful earnest? Nelly, if it be not too late,
as soon as I learn how he feels, I'll choose between these two; either
to starve at once--that would be no punishment unless he had a heart--or
to recover, and leave the country. Are you speaking the truth about him
now? Take care. Is he actually so utterly indifferent for my life?'
`Why, ma'am,' I answered, `the master has no idea of your being
deranged; and of course he does not fear that you will let yourself die
of hunger.'
`You think not? Cannot you tell him I will?' she returned. `Persuade
him! speak of your own mind: say you are certain I will!'
`No, you forget, Mrs Linton,' I suggested, `that you have eaten
some food with a relish this evening, and tomorrow you will perceive its
good effects.'
`If I were only sure it would kill him,' she interrupted, `I'd
kill myself directly! These three awful nights, I've never closed my lids--and
oh, I've been tormented! I've been haunted, Nelly! But I begin to fancy
you don't like me. How strange! I thought, though everybody hated and despised
each other, they could not avoid loving me. And they have all turned to
enemies in a few hours: they have, I'm positive; the people here.
How dreary to meet death, surrounded by their cold faces! Isabella terrified
and repelled, afraid to enter the room, it would be so dreadful to watch
Catherine go. And Edgar standing solemnly by to see it over; then offering
prayers of thanks to God for restoring peace to his house, and going back
to his books! What in the name of all that feels has he to do with
books, when I am dying?'
She could not bear the notion which I had put into her head of
Mr Linton's philosophical resignation. Tossing about, she increased her
feverish bewilderment to madness, and tore the pillow with her teeth; then
raising herself up all burning, desired that I would open the window. We
were in the middle of winter, the wind blew strong from the north-east,
and I objected. Both the expressions flitting over her face, and the changes
of her moods, began to alarm me terribly; and brought to my recollection
her former illness, and the doctor's injunction that she should not be
crossed. A minute previously she was violent; now, supported on one arm,
and not noticing my refusal to obey her, she seemed to find childish diversion
in pulling the feathers from the rents she had just made, and ranging them
on the sheet according to their different species: her mind had strayed
to other associations.
`That's a turkey's,' she murmured to herself; `and this is a wild
duck's; and this is a pigeon's.Ah, they put pigeons' feathers in the pillows--no
wonder I couldn't die! Let me take care to throw it on the floor when I
lie down. And here is a moor-cock's; and this--I should know it among a
thousand--it's a lapwing's. Bonny bird; wheeling over our heads in the
middle of the moor. It wanted to get to its nest, for the clouds had touched
the swells, and it felt rain coming. This feather was picked up from the
heath, the bird was not shot: we saw its nest in the winter, full of little
skeletons. Heathcliff set a trap over it, and the old ones dare not come.
I made him promise he'd never shoot a lapwing after that, and he didn't.
Yes, here are more! Did he shoot my lapwings, Nelly? Are they red, any
of them! Let me look.'
`Give over with that baby-work!' I interrupted, dragging the pillow
away, and turning the holes towards the mattress, for she was removing
its contents by handfuls. `Lie down and shut your eyes: you're wandering.
There's a mess! The down is flying about like snow.'
I went here and there collecting it.
`I see in you, Nelly,' she continued dreamily, `an aged woman:
you have grey hair and bent shoulders. This bed is the fairy cave under
Peniston Crag, and you are gathering elf-bolts to hurt our heifers; pretending,
while I am near, that they are only locks of wool. That's what you'll come
to fifty years hence: I know you are not so now. I'm not wandering: you're
mistaken, or else I should believe you really were that withered
hag, and I should think I was under Peniston Crag; and I'm conscious
it's night, and there are two candles on the table making the black press
shine like jet.'
`The black press? where is that?' I asked. `You are talking in
your sleep!'
`It's against the wall, as it always is,' she replied. `It does
appear odd--I see a face in it!'
`There's no press in the room, and never was,' said I, resuming
my seat, and looping up the curtain that I might watch her.
`Don't you see that face?' she inquired, gazing earnestly
at the mirror.
And say what I could, I was incapable of making her comprehend
it to be her own; so I rose and covered it with a shawl.
`It's behind there still!' she pursued anxiously. `And it stirred.
Who is it? I hope it will not come out when you are gone! Oh! Nelly, the
room is haunted! I'm afraid of being alone!'
I took her hand in mine, and bid her be composed: for a succession
of shudders convulsed her frame, and she would keep straining her
gaze towards the glass.
`There's nobody here!' I insisted. `It was yourself, Mrs
Linton: you knew it a while since.'
`Myself!' she gasped, `and the clock is striking twelve! It's
true, then! that's dreadful!'
Her fingers clutched the clothes, and gathered them over her eyes.
I attempted to steal to the door with an intention of calling her husband;
but I was summoned back by a piercing shriek--the shawl had dropped from
the frame.
`Why, what is the matter?' cried I. `Who is coward now?
Wake up! That is the glass--the mirror, Mrs Linton; and you see yourself
in it, and there am I too, by your side.'
Trembling and bewildered, she held me fast, but the horror gradually
passed from her countenance; its paleness gave place to a glow of shame.
`Oh, dear! I thought I was at home,' she sighed. `I thought I
was lying in my chamber at Wuthering Heights. Because I'm weak, my brain
got confused, and I screamed unconsciously. Don t say anything; but stay
with me. I dread sleeping: my dreams appal me.'
`A sound sleep would do you good, ma'am,' I answered; `and I hope
this suffering will prevent your trying starving again.'
`Oh, if I were but in my own bed in the old house!' she went on
bitterly, wringing her hands, `And that wind sounding in the firs by the
lattice. Do let me feel it--it comes straight down the moor--do let me
have one breath!'
To pacify her, I held the casement ajar a few seconds. A cold
blast rushed through; I closed it, and returned to my post. She lay still
now, her face bathed in tears. Exhaustion of body had entirely subdued
her spirit: our fiery Catherine was no better than a wailing child.
`How long is it since I shut myself in here?' she asked, suddenly
reviving.
`It was Monday evening,' I replied, `and this is Thursday night,
or rather Friday morning, at present.
`What! of the same week?' she exclaimed. `Only that brief time?'
`Long enough to live on nothing but cold water and ill-temper,
observed I.
`Well, it seems a weary number of hours,' she muttered doubtfully:
`it must be more. I remember being in the parlour after they had quarrelled,
and Edgar being cruelly provoking, and me running into this room desperate.
As soon as ever I had barred the door, utter blackness overwhelmed me,
and I fell on the floor. I couldn't explain to Edgar how certain I felt
of having a fit, or going raging mad, if he persisted in teasing me! I
had no command of tongue, or brain, and he did not guess my agony, perhaps:
it barely left me sense to try to escape from him and his voice. Before
I recovered sufficiently to see and hear, it began to be dawn, and, Nelly,
I'll tell you what I thought, and what has kept recurring and recurring
till I feared for my reason. I thought as I lay there, with my head against
that table leg, and my eyes dimly discerning the grey square of the window,
that I was enclosed in the oak-panelled bed at home; and my heart ached
with some great grief which, just waking, I could not recollect. I pondered,
and worried myself to discover what it could be, and, most strangely, the
whole last seven years of my life grew a blank! I did not recall that they
had been at all. I was a child; my father was just buried, and my misery
arose from the separation that Hindley had ordered between me and Heathcliff.
I was laid alone, for the first time; and, rousing from a dismal doze after
a night of weeping, I lifted my hand to push the panels aside: it struck
the table top! I swept it along the carpet, and then memory burst in: my
late anguish was swallowed in a paroxysm of despair. I cannot say why I
felt so wildly wretched: it must have been temporary derangement, for there
is scarcely cause. But, supposing at twelve years old I had been wrenched
from the Heights, and every early association, and my all in all, as Heathcliff
was at that time, and been converted at a stroke into Mrs Linton, the lady
of Thrushcross Grange, and the wife of a stranger: an exile, and outcast,
thenceforth, from what had been my world. You may fancy a glimpse of the
abyss where I grovelled! Shake your head as you will, Nelly, you
have helped to unsettle me! You should have spoken to Edgar, indeed you
should, and compelled him to leave me quiet! Oh, I'm burning! I wish I
were out of doors! I wish I were a girl again, half savage and hardy, and
free; and laughing at injuries, not maddening under them! Why am I so changed?
why does my blood rush into a hell of tumult at a few words? I'm sure I
should be myself were I once among the heather on those hills. Open the
window again wide: fasten it open! Quick, why don't you move?'
`Because I won't give you your death of cold,' I answered.
`You won't give me a chance of life, you mean,' she said sullenly.
`However, I'm not helpless, yet: I'll open it myself.'
And sliding from the bed before I could hinder her, she crossed
the room, walking very uncertainly, threw it back, and bent out, careless
of the frosty air that cut about her shoulders as keen as a knife. I entreated,
and finally attempted to force her to retire. But I soon found her delirious
strength much surpassed mine (she was delirious, I became convinced
by her subsequent actions and ravings). There was no moon, and everything
beneath lay in misty darkness: not a light gleamed from any house, far
or near--all had been extinguished long ago; and those at Wuthering Heights
were never visible--still she asserted she caught their shining.
`Look!' she cried eagerly, `that's my room with the candle in
it, and the trees swaying before it: and the other candle is in Joseph's
garret. Joseph sits up late, doesn't he? He's waiting till I come home
that he may lock the gate. Well, he'll wait a while yet. It's a rough journey,
and a sad heart to travel it; and we must pass by Gimmerton Kirk, to go
that journey! We've braved its ghosts often together, and dared each other
to stand among the graves and ask them to come. But, Heathcliff, if I dare
you now, will you venture? If you do, I'll keep you. I'll not lie there
by myself: they may bury me twelve feet deep, and throw the church down
over me, but I won't rest till you are with me. I never will!'
She paused, and resumed with a strange smile. `He's considering--he'd
rather I'd come to him! Find a way, then! not through that kirkyard. You
are slow! Be content, you always followed me!'
Perceiving it vain to argue against her insanity, I was planning
how I could reach something to wrap about her, without quitting my hold
of herself (for I could not trust her alone by the gaping lattice), when,
to my consternation, I heard the rattle of the door handle, and Mr Linton
entered. He had only then come from the library; and, in passing through
the lobby, had noticed our talking and been attracted by curiosity, or
fear, to examine what it signified, at that late hour.
`Oh, sir!' I cried, checking the exclamation risen to his lips
at the sight which met him, and the bleak atmosphere of the chamber. `My
poor mistress is ill, and she quite masters me: I cannot manage her at
all; pray, come and persuade her to go to bed. Forget your anger, for she's
hard to guide any way but her own.'
`Catherine ill?' he said, hastening to us. `Shut the window, Ellen!
Catherine! why--
He was silent. The haggardness of Mrs Linton's appearance smote
him speechless, and he could only glance from her to me in horrified astonishment.
`She's been fretting here,' I continued, `and eating scarcely
anything, and never complaining; she would admit none of us till this evening,
and so we couldn't inform you of her state as we were not aware of it ourselves;
but it is nothing.'
I felt I uttered my explanations awkwardly; the master frowned.
`It is nothing, is it, Ellen Dean?' he said sternly. `You shall account
more clearly for keeping me ignorant of this!' And he took his wife in
his arms, and looked at her with anguish.
At first she gave him no glance of recognition; he was invisible
to her abstracted gaze. The delirium was not fixed, however; having weaned
her eyes from contemplating the outer darkness, by degrees she centred
her attention on him, and discovered who it was that held her.
`Ah! you are come, are you, Edgar Linton?' she said, with angry
animation. `You are one of those things that are ever found when least
wanted, and when you are wanted, never! I suppose we shall have plenty
of lamentations now--I see we shall--but they can't keep me from my narrow
home out yonder: my resting-place, where I'm bound before spring is over!
There it is: not among the Lintons, mind, under the chapel roof, but in
the open air, with a headstone; and you may please yourself, whether you
go to them or come to me!'
`Catherine, what have you done?' commenced the master. `Am I nothing
to you any more? Do you love that wretch Heath--'
`Hush!' cried Mrs Linton. `Hush, this moment! You mention that
name and I end the matter instantly, by a spring from the window! What
you touch at present you may have; but my soul will be on that hill top
before you lay hands on me again. I don't want you, Edgar: I'm past wanting
you. Return to your books. I'm glad you possess a consolation, for all
you had in me is gone.'
`Her mind wanders, sir,' I interposed. `She has been talking nonsense
the whole evening; but let her have quiet, and proper attendance, and she'll
rally. Hereafter, we must be cautious how we vex her.'
`I desire no further advice from you,' answered Mr Linton. `You
know your mistress's nature, and you encouraged me to harass her. And not
to give me one hint of how she has been these three days! It was heartless!
Months of sickness could not cause such a change!'
I began to defend myself, thinking it too bad to be blamed for
another's wicked waywardness. `I knew Mrs Linton's nature to be headstrong
and domineering,' cried I; `but I didn't know that you wished to foster
her fierce temper! I didn't know that, to humour her, I should wink at
Mr Heathcliff. I performed the duty of a faithful servant in telling you,
and I have got a faithful servant's wages! Well, it will teach me to be
careful next time. Next time you may gather intelligence for yourself!'
`The next time you bring a tale to me, you shall quit my service,
Ellen Dean,' he replied.
`You'd rather hear nothing about it, I suppose, then, Mr Linton?'
said I. `Heathcliff has your permission to come a courting to miss, and
to drop in at every opportunity your absence offers, on purpose to poison
the mistress against you?'
Confused as Catherine was, her wits were alert at applying our
conversation.
`Ah! Nelly has played traitor,' she exclaimed passionately. `Nelly
is my hidden enemy. You witch! So you do seek elf-bolts to hurt us! Let
me go, I'll make her rue! I'll make her howl a recantation!'
A maniac's fury kindled under her brows; she struggled desperately
to disengage herself from Linton's arms. I felt no inclination to tarry
the event; and, resolving to seek medical aid on my own responsibility,
I quitted the chamber.
In passing the garden to reach the road, at a place where a bridle
hook is driven into the wall, I saw something white moved irregularly,
evidently by another agent than the wind. Notwithstanding my hurry, I stayed
to examine it, lest ever after I should have the conviction impressed on
my imagination that it was a creature of the other world. My surprise and
perplexity were great to discover, by touch more than vision, Miss Isabella's
springer, Fanny, suspended by a handkerchief, and nearly at its last gasp.
I quickly released the animal, and lifted it into the garden. I had seen
it follow its mistress upstairs when she went to bed; and wondered much
how it could have got out there, and what mischievous person had treated
it so. While untying the knot round the hook, it seemed to me that I repeatedly
caught the beat of horses' feet galloping at some distance; but there were
such a number of things to occupy my reflections that I hardly gave the
circumstance a thought: though it was a strange sound, in that place, at
two o'clock in the morning.
Mr Kenneth was fortunately just issuing from his house to see
a patient in the village as I came up the street; and my account of Catherine
Linton's malady induced him to accompany me back immediately. He was a
plain rough man; and he made no scruple to speak his doubts of her surviving
this second attack; unless she were more submissive to his directions than
she had shown herself before.
`Nelly Dean,' said he, `I can't help fancying there's an extra
cause for this. What has there been to do at the Grange? We've odd reports
up here. A stout, hearty lass like Catherine, does not fall ill for a trifle;
and that sort of people should not either. It's hard work bringing them
through fevers, and such things. How did it begin?'
`The master will inform you,' I answered; `but you are acquainted
with the Earnshaws' violent dispositions, and Mrs Linton caps them all.
I may say this: it commenced in a quarrel. She was struck during a tempest
of passion with a kind of fit. That's her account, at least; for she flew
off in the height of it, and locked herself up. Afterwards, she refused
to eat, and now she alternately raves and remains in a half-dream; knowing
those about her, by having her mind filled with all sorts of strange ideas
and illusions.'
`Mr Linton will be sorry?' observed Kenneth, interrogatively.
`Sorry? he'll break his heart should anything happen!' I replied.
`Don't alarm him more than necessary.
`Well, I told him to beware,' said my companion; `and he must
bide the consequences of neglecting my warning! Hasn't he been thick with
Mr Heathcliff, lately?'
`Heathcliff frequently visits at the Grange,' answered I, `though
more on the strength of the mistress having known him when a boy, than
because the master likes his company. At present, he's discharged from
the trouble of calling; owing to some presumptuous aspirations after Miss
Linton which he manifested. I hardly think he'll be taken in again.'
`And does Miss Linton turn a cold shoulder on him?' was the doctor's
next question.
`I'm not in her confidence,' returned I, reluctant to continue
the subject.
`No, she's a sly one,' he remarked, shaking his head. `She keeps
her own counsel! But she's a real little fool. I have it from good authority,
that, last night (and a pretty night it was!) she and Heathcliff were walking
in the plantation at the back of your house, above two hours; and he pressed
her not to go in again, but just mount his horse and away with him! My
informant said she could only put him off by pledging her word of honour
to be prepared on their first meeting after that: when it was to be, he
didn't hear; but you urge Mr Linton to look sharp!'
This news filled me with fresh fears; I outstripped Kenneth, and
ran most of the way back. The little dog was yelping in the garden yet.
I spared a minute to open the gate for it, but instead of going to the
house door, it coursed up and down snuffing the grass, and would have escaped
to the road, had I not seized and conveyed it in with me. On ascending
to Isabella's room, my suspicions were confirmed: it was empty. Had I been
a few hours sooner, Mrs Linton's illness might have arrested her rash step.
But what could be done now? There was a bare possibility of overtaking
them if pursued instantly. I could not pursue them, however; and I dare
not rouse the family, and fill the place with confusion; still less unfold
the business to my master, absorbed as he was in his present calamity,
and having no heart to spare for a second grief! I saw nothing for it but
to hold my tongue, and suffer matters to take their course; and Kenneth
being arrived, I went with a badly composed countenance to announce him.
Catherine lay in a troubled sleep: her husband had succeeded in soothing
the access of frenzy: he now hung over her pillow, watching every shade,
and every change of her painfully expressive features.
The doctor, on examining the case for himself, spoke hopefully
to him of its having a favourable termination, if we could only preserve
around her perfect and constant tranquillity. To me, he signified the threatening
danger was not so much death, as permanent alienation of intellect.
I did not close my eyes that night, nor did Mr Linton: indeed,
we never went to bed; and the servants were all up long before the usual
hour, moving through the house with stealthy tread, and exchanging whispers
as they encountered each other in their vocations. Everyone was active,
but Miss Isabella; and they began to remark how sound she slept: her brother,
too, asked if she had risen, and seemed impatient for her presence, and
hurt that she showed so little anxiety for her sister-in-law. I trembled
lest he should send me to call her; but I was spared the pain of being
the first proclaimant of her flight. One of the maids, a thoughtless girl,
who had been on an early errand to Gimmerton, came panting upstairs, openmouthed,
and dashed into the chamber, crying:
`Oh, dear, dear! What mun we have next? Master, master, our young
lady--
`Hold your noise!' cried I hastily, enraged at her clamorous manner.
`Speak lower, Mary--What is the matter?' said Mr Linton. `What
ails your young lady?'
`She's gone, she's gone! Yon' Heathcliff's run off wi' her!' gasped
the girl.
`That is not true!' exclaimed Linton, rising in agitation. `It
cannot be: how has the idea entered your head? Ellen Dean, go and seek
her. It is incredible: it cannot be.'
As he spoke he took the servant to the door, and then repeated
his demand to know her reasons for such an assertion.
`Why, I met on the road a lad that fetches milk here,' she stammered,
`and he asked whether we weren't in trouble at the Grange. I thought he
meant for missis's sickness, so I answered, yes. Then says he, "They's
somebody gone after `em, I guess?" I stared. He saw I knew nought about
it, and he told how a gentleman and lady had stopped to have a horse's
shoe fastened at a blacksmith's shop, two miles out of Gimmerton, not very
long after midnight! and how the blacksmith's lass had got up to spy who
they were: she knew them both directly. And she noticed the man--Heathcliff
it was, she felt certain: nobody could mistake him, besides--put a sovereign
in her father's hand for payment. The lady had a cloak about her face;
but having desired a sup of water, while she drank, it fell back, and she
saw her very plain. Heathcliff held both bridles as they rode on, and they
set their faces from the village, and went as fast as the rough roads would
let them. The lass said nothing to her father, but she told it all over
Gimmerton this morning.'
I ran and peeped, for form's sake, into Isabella's room; confirming,
when I returned, the servant's statement. Mr Linton had resumed his seat
by the bed; on my re-entrance, he raised his eyes, read the meaning of
my blank aspect, and dropped them without giving an order, or uttering
a word.
`Are we to try any measures for overtaking and bringing her back?'
I inquired. `How should we do?'
`She went of her own accord,' answered the master; `she had a
right to go if she pleased. Trouble me no more about her. Hereafter she
is only my sister in name: not because I disown her, but because she has
disowned me.'
And that was all he said on the subject: he did not make a single
inquiry further, or mention her in any way, except directing me to send
what property she had in the house to her fresh home, wherever it was,
when I knew it.
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