Thefatigueresultingfromtheeffortexceedingourforces,imposedbytheunsatisfactoryconditionsofourlabor,wasaugmentedbytheinvasionofpublicity.Theoverturnofourvoluntaryisolationwasacauseofrealsufferingforusandhadalltheeffectofdisaster.Itwasserioustroublebroughtintotheorganizationofourlife,andIhavealreadyexplainedhowindispensablewasourfreedomfromexternaldistraction,inordertomaintainourfamilylifeandourscientificactivity.Ofcourse,peoplewhocontributetothatkindoftroublegenerallymeanitkindly.Itisonlythattheydonotrealizetheconditionsoftheproblem.
Inourseconddaughter,EveDenise,cametous.Ihad,ofcourse,tointerruptmyworkinthelaboratoryforawhile.Inthesameyear,becauseoftheawardingoftheNobelprizeandthegeneralpublicrecognition,anewchairofphysicswascreatedinSorbonne,andmyhusbandwasnamedasitsoccupant.AtthesametimeIwasnamedchiefofworkinthelaboratorythatwastobecreatedforhim.Butinrealitythelaboratorywasnotconstructedthen,andonlyafewroomstakenfromotheruseswereavailabletous.
Injustasweweredefinitelygivinguptheoldshedlaboratorywherewehadbeensohappy,therecamethedreadfulcatastrophewhichtookmyhusbandawayfrommeandleftmealonetobringupourchildrenand,atthesametime,tocontinueourworkofresearch.
Itisimpossibleformetoexpresstheprofoundnessandimportanceofthecrisisbroughtintomylifebythelossoftheonewhohadbeenmyclosestcompanionandbestfriend.Crushedbytheblow,Ididnotfeelabletofacethefuture.Icouldnotforget,however,whatmyhusbandusedsometimestosay,that,evendeprivedofhim,Ioughttocontinuemywork.
Thedeathofmyhusband,comingimmediatelyafterthegeneralknowledgeofthediscoverieswithwhichhisnameisassociated,wasfeltbythepublic,andespeciallybythescientificcircles,tobeanationalmisfortune.ItwaslargelyundertheinfluenceofthisemotionthattheFacultyofSciencesofParisdecidedtooffermethechair,asprofessor,whichmyhusbandhadoccupiedonlyoneyearandahalfintheSorbonne.Itwasanexceptionaldecision,asuptothennowomanhadheldsuchaposition.TheUniversitybydoingthisofferedmeapreciousmarkofesteemandgavemeopportunitytopursuetheresearcheswhichotherwisemighthavehadtobeabandoned.Ihadnotexpectedagiftofthiskind;Ineverhadanyotherambitionthantobeabletoworkfreelyforscience.Thehonorthatnowcametomewasdeeplypainfulunderthecruelcircumstancesofitscoming.BesidesIwonderedwhetherIwouldbeabletofacesuchagraveresponsibility.Aftermuchhesitation,IdecidedthatIoughtatleasttotrytomeetthetask,andsoIbeganinmyteachingintheSorbonne,asassistantprofessor,andtwoyearslaterIwasnamedtitularprofessor.
Inmynewsituationthedifficultiesofmylifewereconsiderablyaugmented,asIalonehadnowtocarrytheburdenformerlyweighingonmyhusbandandmetogether.Thecaresofmyyoungchildrenrequiredclosevigilance;inthis,myhusband'sfather,whocontinuedtolivewithus,willinglytookhisshare.Hewashappytobeoccupiedwiththelittlegirls,whosecompanywashischiefconsolationafterhisson'sdeath.Byhiseffortandmine,thechildrenhadabrighthome,evenifwelivedwithourinnergrief,whichtheyweretooyoungtorealize.Thestrongdesireofmyfather-in-lawbeingtoliveinthecountry,wetookahousewithagardeninSceaux,asuburbofParis,fromwhichIcouldreachthecityinhalfanhour.
Thiscountrylifehadgreatadvantages,notonlyformyfather-in-law,whoenjoyedhisnewsurroundings,andespeciallyhisgarden,butalsoformygirls,whohadthebenefitofwalksintheopencountry.Buttheyweremoreseparatedfromme,anditbecamenecessarytohaveagovernessforthem.Thispositionwasfilledfirstbyoneofmycousins,andthenbyadevotedwomanwhohadalreadybroughtupthedaughterofoneofmysisters.BothofthemwerePolish,andinthiswaymydaughterslearnedmynativetongue.Fromtimetotime,someoneofmyPolishfamilycametoseemeinmygrief,andwemanagedtomeetinvacationtime,attheseashoreinFrance,andonceinthemountainsofPoland.
Inwesufferedthelossofmyverydearfather-in-law,afteralongillness,whichbroughtmemanysorrowfuldays.IusedtospendathisbedsideasmuchtimeasIcould,listeningtohisremembrancesofpassedyears.Hisdeathaffecteddeeplymyelderdaughter,who,attwelve,knewthevalueofthecheerfulhoursspentinhiscompany.
TherewerefewresourcesfortheeducationofmydaughtersinSceaux.Theyoungestone,asmallchild,neededprincipallyahygieniclife,outdoorwalksandquiteelementaryschooling.Shehadalreadyshownavividintelligenceandanunusualdispositionformusic.Hereldersisterresembledherfatherintheformofherintelligence.Shewasnotquick,butonecouldalreadyseethatshehadagiftofreasoningpowerandthatshewouldlikescience.ShehadsometraininginaprivateschoolinParis,butIhadnotwantedtokeepherinalycee,asIhavealwaysfoundtheclasshoursintheseschoolstoolongforthehealthofthechildren.
Myviewisthatintheeducationofchildrentherequirementoftheirgrowthandphysicalevolutionshouldberespected,andthatsometimeshouldbeleftfortheirartisticculture.Inmostschools,astheyexistto-day,thetimespentinvariousreadingandwritingexercisesistoogreat,andthestudyrequiredtobedoneathometoomuch.Ialsofindtheseschoolslacking,ingeneral,inpracticalexercisestoaccompanythescientificstudies.